In recent years,many small local shops have closed because customers travel to large shopping centersor malls to do their shopping. Is this a positive or a negative develpoment?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays,
people
Use synonyms
were doing shopping a lot at big malls. Whereas,
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
to
small
Add an article
a small
show examples
Use synonyms
shop
Fix the agreement mistake
shops
show examples
in their local areas. A group of
people
Use synonyms
say, buying a product from
supermarket
Add an article
the supermarket
a supermarket
show examples
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
much cheaper than shopping from
local
Add an article
a local
the local
show examples
shop
Use synonyms
.I firmly believe that overall it’s a negative development of society and
this
Linking Words
lead to unemployment of many
people
Use synonyms
. Recently,as per the government data,
many
Replace the quantifier
much
show examples
small business
Use synonyms
shop
Change to a plural noun
shops
show examples
were shut down because of
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
their poor sale as
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to big outlet
store
Fix the agreement mistake
stores
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
is because of
friendly
Add an article
the friendly
a friendly
show examples
environment which was created in favour of large shopping
store
Fix the agreement mistake
stores
show examples
to make their firm profitable.
Therefore
Linking Words
,small retail store sales were going down drastically over a period of time and
this
Linking Words
lead
Replace the word
led
show examples
to
closing
Add an article
the closing
show examples
of
Use synonyms
Add an article
the shop
show examples
shop
Fix the agreement mistake
shops
show examples
.Take for
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
instant,
people
Use synonyms
frequently
Correct pronoun usage
who frequently
show examples
buy different goods from big retail chain company at
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
cheap cost which
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
small merchant vulnerable towards their profit margin.
However
Linking Words
,we can not neglect the popularity of big shopping
mall
Fix the agreement mistake
malls
show examples
in local society, as they provide better customer service as well as product services.
Also
Linking Words
,they are putting much higher sale
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
to
others
Fix the agreement mistake
other shops
show examples
shop
Use synonyms
and
this
Linking Words
is because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
they are buying goods
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
wholesale
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
,one of the most popular
chain
Fix the agreement mistake
chains
show examples
cotsco
Correct your spelling
Costco
,sales enormous amount of
good
Fix the agreement mistake
goods
show examples
in one financial year
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
to
cumulative
Correct article usage
the cumulative
show examples
of thousands of small
shop
Use synonyms
vendors.
Therefore
Linking Words
, to
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
conclude, after reviewing both the scenario,I totally agree that during a period of time big shopping
mall
Fix the agreement mistake
malls
show examples
will replace small locals shops and will dominate the market share,which is
overall
Add an article
an overall
the overall
show examples
negative impact on local
merchant
Fix the agreement mistake
merchants
show examples
and
also
Linking Words
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
their
livelihood
Fix the agreement mistake
livelihoods
show examples
on which their family
were depend
Change the verb form
depended
show examples
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: