Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problem. sugary products should be made more experience to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

#food #drink #products #levels #sugar #health #people

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Big portions of foods and drinks made in factories have

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

remarkable

amounts

Correct the article-noun agreement

amount

show examples

of sugar. Sugar consumption leads to serious

problems

Use synonyms

for human health. These types of products are essential to rise their

prices

Use synonyms

to prevent high-level buying between

people

Use synonyms

. I do not agree with

this

Linking Words

statement because could makes some

problems

Use synonyms

. Increasing the

prices

Use synonyms

is not the solution! Governments and officials can have better strategies for concerns.

Firstly

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

matter has economical harm to the food industry. If

prices

Use synonyms

go up and

people

Use synonyms

decide to buy less and factories' incomes dump increasingly, in ,consequence they explain their workers and employees and

Change preposition

show examples

the end unemployment rate will rise in society. ,

,,,

Change the punctuation

apply

show examples

Secondly

Linking Words

it is not a reasonable way because after that

people

Use synonyms

spend their money on

another

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

model of harmful food,

for example

Linking Words

: junk food and fried foods.

Also

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

method,

people

Use synonyms

will be unsatisfied as the government make choice for their personal life and their personal privacy will be broken with

this

Linking Words

action. It is clear that these products have non-standard levels of sugar, but they should teach society about their health and the impacts of the ingredients they consume, for ,

Add an article

the

show examples

instance having stations with related experts in public places like parks will be a useful method. Education for children is key to the problem because if you teach children, they carry with them what they learned until they will be alive. Governments

also

Linking Words

provide budgets for programmes with taxes they receive from factories. Some may argue that it is necessary to increase the

prices

Use synonyms

and protects society's health. They believe governments should make decisions for citizens' daily life and what they consume. In conclusion, I believe it is not a suitable way and the choice of what you eat is not related to anyone and it

also

Linking Words

has bad effects on the economy. In the

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

end making numerous

problems

Use synonyms

to solve other

problems

Use synonyms

is not reasonable.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

320 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

health problems
manufactured food and drink products
sugary products
excessive sugar consumption
discourage
promote
healthier choices
reduce
increased taxes
fund
health education
prevention programs

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Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problem. sugary products should be made more experience to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

some people think that children should only read academic book. other believe that reading books for pleasure is equally important. Discuss both views and give your opi nion.

Directors large organisations earn much higher salaries than ordinary employees. Some people think it is necessary, but others believe that it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In some countries, the number of shooting massacres is on the rise because many people have guns at home. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Some people believe that time spent on television, video and computer games can be valuable for children. Others beleve this may have negative effects on a child's development. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some pople believe that children should be taught academic subject at school, while other think that teaching pratical skills is more important. discuss both view and give your own opinion.