Some people consider that school education should be concentrated on academic subjects, which would be helpful for their future careers, and subjects like music and sport are not useful. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is believed that to be prosperous in future careers, the
school
should prioritize lessons on academic
subjects
rather than
sports
and
music
. I am of the opinion that all
subjects
matter, including
music
and sport.
Firstly
, it is important to achieve a balance between academics,
sports
, and
music
. Not only the
students
will have wide knowledge, but the function of those
subjects
support each other.
For instance
, understanding the complicated partiture in
music
requires strong analysis in the brain,
as a result
, it can
also
be a practice for the brain in terms of critical thinking. Another reason is the
school
should be able to accommodate
students
who have talent in
sports
and art.
Furthermore
, the
school
need to develop their talent so they can represent their
school
, and might win a competition. Another sound argument is academic
subjects
themselves will not be enough for
students
to compete in global competitions.
This
means, learning art is good for developing their sense of creativity
,
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apply
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while being active in sport
also
play an important role to keep them healthy.
Additionally
, doing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
regular activities at
school
is a good way to build healthy habits when they grow up. In conclusion,keeping the balance between academics,
sports
and
music
is the best way to develop a well-rounded human being who has wide knowledge and skill. Other than that, learning all those
subjects
will create a good habit to prepare the
students
facing the competitive career in the future.
Submitted by fitri.antoni on

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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic education
  • soft skills
  • teamwork
  • discipline
  • time management
  • leadership
  • mental well-being
  • physical health
  • academic performance
  • creativity
  • innovative thinking
  • STEM fields
  • career opportunities
  • entertainment industry
  • sports industry
  • life balance
  • academic stress
  • burnout
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