IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many developing countries, there is an increased movement of workers from rural areas in to cities. Why do you think this happens? What problems can this cause?

#countries #movement #workers #areas #cities
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It is argued that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
metropolitan
cities
Use synonyms
 all over the world are crowded and
this
Linking Words
 is a serious obstacle.
This
Linking Words
 essay will
first
Linking Words
 suggest that the main cause of
this
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 phenomenon is that rural
areas
Use synonyms
 in most countries are unattractive for living there and that investing money in developing the
countryside
Use synonyms
 is the most viable solution. The foremost problem which leads to overpopulation of urban
areas
Use synonyms
 is that the rural
areas
Use synonyms
 of many countries, where a variety of
people
Use synonyms
, can not provide to individuals the same facilities and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
high standards of life in comparison with
a gigantic
Correct the article-noun agreement
gigantic cities
a gigantic city
show examples
cities
Use synonyms
. Many
people
Use synonyms
 move from
Use synonyms
countryside
Add an article
the countryside
show examples
 to big
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
, because the amenities in various small regions are on a very low level,
such
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 as health care
service
Use synonyms
, some
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
 of products or materials are not available,
moreover
Linking Words
, the
transport
Use synonyms
 system is terrible and not developed enough.
For instance
Linking Words
, in
Russia
Add a comma
,Russia
show examples
 there are
enormous
Add an article
an enormous
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 amount of rural
areas
Use synonyms
 which is hardly connected by
transport
Use synonyms
 with the big
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
, and
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 recent article in “Russia
today
Change the capitalization
Today
show examples
” revealed that one town of
Linking Words
such
Add an article
the such
show examples
area
Correct article usage
an area
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 was locked
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a week without food and necessary
service
Use synonyms
, because helicopter, which is the only one
transport
Use synonyms
 who can provide the
service
Use synonyms
 to the region, was broken, and
people
Use synonyms
 were locked in the town as well. A possible solution to
this
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 problem would be the development of rural
areas
Use synonyms
 and provide mod cons as the huge
cities
Use synonyms
 have. The Government should invest money in the
transport
Use synonyms
 system of regions and
Use synonyms
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
show examples
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
areas
Use synonyms
, and develop other facilities in rural
areas
Use synonyms
 to save the
people
Use synonyms
 in
such
Linking Words
 regions.
For example
Linking Words
,
Belgium
Change preposition
in Belgium
show examples
,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 country where
people
Use synonyms
 mostly live in the
countryside
Use synonyms
instead
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 of the major urban
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
, because the facilities in small
cities
Use synonyms
 are developed on a high level,
people
Use synonyms
 have everything they need and do not run to big
cities
Use synonyms
. To conclude, the overcrowding of big
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
 is caused by
migration
Correct article usage
the migration
show examples
 of nations from rural
areas
Use synonyms
, because these
areas
Use synonyms
 can not provide a
comfort
Replace the word
comfortable
show examples
 life for citizens. The most effective solution
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 problem is developing the
countryside
Use synonyms
 and providing all comforts
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
 living in
such
Linking Words
areas
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by dulskywork on

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