Many believe that success in life mainly depends on hard work and determination while others believe that factors like money and personal appearance are important. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#success #life #work #determination #factors #money #appearance

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It is believed by some that the dailies should sell the

products

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which are produced by local brands

instead

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of selling the import

products

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. I completely disagree with

this

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opinion.

This

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essay will

first

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illustrate that

this

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tendency will not help local brands to be competitive and

then

Linking Words

discuss that some of the

products

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are impossible to grow in various

countries

Use synonyms

Firstly

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, the market must always remain competitive and

this

Linking Words

can be possible only if customers have a choice to buy different brands of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

products

Use synonyms

In other words

Linking Words

, if supermarkets will sell only the

products

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of local businesses, it can affect the quality of the product and companies may sacrifice some necessary standards

Change preposition

show examples

a stage of production.

For instance

Linking Words

, in

Tajikistan

Add a comma

,Tajikistan

show examples

it is forbidden to import food, and

products

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which are made by national companies cost a lot, but the quality does not match the price.

Secondly

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, many different

products

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can not be grown in some

countries

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because of climate conditions,

such

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as some kinds of vegetables and fruits. To put it another way, it means that if shops in

such

Linking Words

particular

countries

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sold

products

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which are produced in their own country,

then

Linking Words

people would never try some kind of

products

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, like bananas or mango.

For example

Linking Words

, the UAE is

the

Correct article usage

show examples

country where can not be grown any fruits or vegetables because of the specific geographic area,

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

means that the import of

these kind

Change the determiner

this kind

these kinds

show examples

of food is

vital

Add an article

a vital

the vital

show examples

thing for

this

Linking Words

country. To conclude, there is an opinion that supermarkets need to sell the

products

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which are made by local businesses.

This

Linking Words

essay totally disagrees with

this

Linking Words

suggestion, because it breaks the competition in the market, and the

second

Linking Words

reason is that some

countries

Use synonyms

can not provide

Change preposition

apply

show examples

customers

some

Change preposition

with some

show examples

kind of food because of climate conditions in

some

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

particular

countries

Use synonyms

Submitted by dulskywork on Mon Dec 12 2022

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

304 words

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Some people think that governments should spend money on railways. Others believe that there should be more investment into new roads. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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Some people say that children should be involved in making schools' rules. Some argue that adults should be in charge of making rules. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

Only 20% of Tech Jobs are Held by Women. What problems do women face that prevent them from getting these jobs and what must be done to change this situation.