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Band 4.5

To succeed in a business, one needs to know math’s. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#business #math’s
It is true that working in
economic
Correct article usage
the economic
show examples
 field requires a
depht
Correct your spelling
deep
 knowledge of Mathematics. Personally, a person or a businessman will need
Math
 as their tool to achieve anything else.
Firstly
,
Math
 can
solves
Wrong verb form
solve
show examples
 sophisticated equations. Businessmen can use
math
 to calculate their income, outcome or the salaries of employees.
For instance
, they can count the profits those employees bring and
then
 give reasonable wages.
Secondly
, learning
Math
 will allow people to have a creative mind and improve critical thinking.
Undoubtably
Correct your spelling
Undoubtedly
show examples
, a genius in
Math
 or other fields related to
Math
 always solves the issues in the fastest and most intelligent ways.
As a result
, those who intended to graduate
science
Change preposition
from science
show examples
 or
math
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
 will have more chances to meet with success.
On the other hand
, some undergraduates confirmed that they did not complete any class or school but still came off well. It might be true in a few cases, but in reality, they must have little knowledge
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
Math
 to solve easy problems. To achieve
such
 a successful result in
business
, a company must have accountants and managers in
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
, but on top of
that is
 a leader who has trustable ideas and strategies to bring their team
come
Fix the infinitive
to come
show examples
 up with extraordinary solutions. In conclusion,
math
 is not only the way to succeed in
business
, but it is still crucial when they want to start a
business
 with a minimum
time
Change preposition
of time
show examples
 and money. Undergraduates can still
be succeed
Change the verb form
succeed
show examples
 in
business
, but they are required to gain knowledge from life or primary
Math
 classes.
Submitted by cmdung2003 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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