IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Discipline is an ever-increasing problem in modern schools. Some people think that discipline should be the responsibility of teachers, while others think that this is the role of parents. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#discipline #schools #people #responsibility #teachers #role #parents
In recent years, training is more rising trouble in
contemporary
Add an article
the contemporary
show examples
academy
Fix the agreement mistake
academies
show examples
. Few humans strongly believe that
rule
Fix the agreement mistake
rules
show examples
 ought to responsibility of tutors, while
anothers
Correct your spelling
others
 think that
this
 is the role of
mother
Fix the agreement mistake
mothers
show examples
 and fathers. From my point of view, it more depends on
parents
 because
students
 are more together with their
parents
. In
this
 essay, I discuss both these will be considered and elucidated. On the one hand, majorities
individuals
Change preposition
of individuals
show examples
 believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
children
 are mainly couched by
parents
 because since
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
 birth, they
always
Add a missing verb
have always
show examples
closly
Correct your spelling
closely
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
parents
.
Therefore
,
guardian
Fix the agreement mistake
guardians
show examples
 tend on training their
children
 because
parents
 teach a lot of
duty
Fix the agreement mistake
duties
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 their
children
such
 as
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
 up earlier in the morning.
Also
, the
students
 are together with
parents
 than
teachers
 because
children
 are raised by their
parents
 until they go to high school.
For example
, according to psychology research
parents
behivers
Correct your spelling
behaviours
 more influence
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
Correct article usage
the adolesent's
show examples
adolesent's
Correct your spelling
adolescent's
adolescents
disciplines
Fix the agreement mistake
discipline
show examples
 because if it has
advance
Replace the word
advanced
show examples
 atmosphere in
family
Add an article
the family
show examples
,
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
 discipline is more
effectively
Replace the word
effective
show examples
.
On the other hand
,
teachers
 have a special role in disciplining
children
, because if
parents
 teach
children
 from the worldly side,
teachers
 will give them knowledge and help them to find their way in the future.
In addition
,
teachers
 have a lot of knowledge about culture.
For example
, in my country, many people believe that
teachers
 should
also
 strictly control the education of
students
. In conclusion, it can be said that both
parents
 and
teachers
 have a great contribution to the education of teenagers
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because
students
 spend a lot of time with their
parents
 and
teachers
.
Submitted by Premium Version on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: