IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Many young people change their jobs and careers. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages

#people #change #jobs #careers
Having a
job
 nowadays is not an easy goal to achieve,as
people
 face a lot of competitors and the work field now is easy to get in and not rely entirely anymore on personal certificates only.
Although
,most of the youth today are pointing their targets towards changing their places of work
instead
 of being in the same workplace for a long time.
this
 essay will argue the benefits
besides
 consequences resulting from
this
 issue. Some
people
 think of careers once they graduate,making their
first
 goal to be financially dependent.For them, changing jobs gives them chances to face different challenges and collect more experience.For example, a study made in the UK recently showed that
people
 tend to change their jobs at least three times before they reach age 40. As result , they can manage their decisions after that more easily and with confidence and high self-esteem. On the other side,there are some who tend to have a steady and stable life.they are considered the
job
 as a good chance for promoting and increasing their salary regularly during spending more years inside the company.
For example
, if we looked at the Middle East ,we will find that the priority there for
people
 is to own or rent a house near their workplace and establish their own family,for them changing career or
job
 have more consequences they are not always ready to handle with. In conclusion,once
people
 start to think of changing their work or career,they should be ready to deal with both sides of the results of that decision.In my opinion, it's necessary to change my
job
,but only if the benefits
then
 are more rational and reasonable to consider.
Submitted by mr.mohamedfouad1012 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • career switch
  • job dissatisfaction
  • financial incentives
  • personal fulfillment
  • professional advancement
  • exploratory journey
  • toxic workplace
  • acquisition of new competencies
  • workplace flexibility
  • adapting to evolving industries
What to do next:
Look at other essays: