Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

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It is a topic
that is
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fiercely debated about shared
information
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. Some
people
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advocate that we should
shared
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share
show examples
information
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from scientific,
economy
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economic
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and academic global,
others
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while others
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believe that we can
shared
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share
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information
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without
restricted
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restriction
show examples
of
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from
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any
sources
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. Scientific research, economy and academic global
is
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are
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an educate
information
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that should
shared
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be shared
share
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to
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with
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the
people
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.
On the other hand
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, those resources
has
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have
show examples
a valuable
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valuable information
a piece of valuable information
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information
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that can broaden
knowledge
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the knowledge
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of
people
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about science, economy and
academic
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academics
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.
People
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may get
information
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from the resources that they don’t have in school.
For instance
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,
people
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get a new insight about the method to develop a small business in a village by reading a business article. Another
rational
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rationale
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, sharing
information
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will be safe because the
sources
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of the
information
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are
validity
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valid
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and reliable
sources
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that
has
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have
show examples
review from some expertise before they publish the
information
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. Unlimited of sharing
information
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will
give
Verb problem
have
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profound
Correct article usage
a profound
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impact
for
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on
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people
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in a community of society. That means
people
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will use all
information
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for their self-development which can lead them to explore their capacity of potential.
For instance
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, a students get
information
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about how to make a
recycle
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recycling
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machine
at the end
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, the students
able
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are able
show examples
to make an
advance
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advanced
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machine that has an
extremely
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extreme
show examples
impact on society. To recapitulate what I have mentioned earlier, sharing
information
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from extensive
of
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apply
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resources has big benefits for
people
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in their country,
however
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, shared
information
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taken from
a trusted
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a trusted source
trusted sources
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sources
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is
a
Correct article usage
the
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foremost
things
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thing
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that
people
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should do. I strongly believe that
have
Wrong verb form
having
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a shared
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shared information
a piece of shared information
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information
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from an academic and
science
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scientific
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source is more efficient and effective.
Furthermore
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, it will enrich us with
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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knowledge and theory.
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coherence cohesion
You need to maintain a more consistent and logical structure throughout your essay, which includes clear paragraphing with topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph. Connect your ideas effectively using a variety of cohesive devices.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction and conclusion are clear and reflect the full scope of the essay's argument. They should distinctly introduce and summarize the main points of the discussion, respectively.
coherence cohesion
Develop your main points more fully with specific examples and explanations. Make sure each paragraph elaborates on a single main idea and provides evidence to support it.
task achievement
Your response is somewhat complete but falls short of developing a fully clear position throughout the response. Ensure your argument is comprehensive and maintains a clear position on the issue.
task achievement
Strive for clarity and express your ideas more comprehensively. Avoid ambiguity and ensure each paragraph conveys a distinct and fully developed idea.
task achievement
Use more relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. This will help to clarify and support your arguments more effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
What to do next:
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