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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

An E-mail has had a huge impact on professional and social communication, but this impact has been negative as well as positive. Do the disadvantages of using e-mail outweigh the advantages?

#e-mail #impact #communication
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In the modern era, technology is the pillar of a human being's life. Nowadays
email
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 plays
Correct article usage
a
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crucial for professional and social
communication
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 , but using
email
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,
there are
Verb problem
has
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 many positive and negative effects on people.
This
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 essay will discuss the disadvantages and advantages of using
email
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 in the following paragraphs. There are many disadvantages to using
email
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. To commence with, in the present, using
email
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, business is affected by cybercrime. To explain , many scams
by using
Wrong verb form
use
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 the company's
email
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.
For example
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, in the survey conducted by the Times of India, Indian hackers hacked hospital data by using
email
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 and did a scam in 2021.
moreover
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, many employees do work at home and they belong to a rural area. So there is sometimes the internet is not possible ,so they cannot
do
Verb problem
apply
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communication
Replace the word
communicate
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 by using
email
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 , so sometimes a number of disadvantages to utilising
email
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.
on the other hand
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, there are many advantages to using
email
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. The first and foremost disadvantage
,
Add a missing verb
is, email
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Correct determiner usage
that
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email
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 is secure as compared to other social apps. So, companies
major
Correct word choice
apply
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prefer to
email
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 for professional
communication
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Secondly
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, a number of employers use
email
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 to enrol new employees , so they can easily find the worker by using
email
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. Most MNC companies and people send pdf, photos and many more secure data by using
email
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 so there are many advantages of
email
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.
For instance
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, a survey conducted by the University of Oxford pointed out that in India , many huge companies
used
Wrong verb form
use
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 e-mail for
communication
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 with their employees. In conclusion, there are many pros of
email
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such
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 as easy
communication
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 and many more but people cannot forget the cons like cyber scams, hacking data and many more.
Submitted by rahulgpatel19 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they need to be more developed and clear.
Task Achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the question and presents clear and comprehensive ideas. However, the examples could be more relevant and specific to support the points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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