We are becoming increasingly dependent on computers. They are used in business, hospitals, crime detection and even to fly planes. Is this dependence on computers a good thing or should we be more suspicious of their benefits?

The issues that are posed by a demographical
situation
are of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
critical importance for any government to address. While many nations are 'getting older', other countries are finding themselves in the opposite
situation
, with a predominant share of
younger
Add an article
the younger
a younger
show examples
population.
This
essay will compare
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
and disadvantages of
such
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
show examples
. One of the most important benefits of having a younger population is the size of the workforce that
such
nation
Correct article usage
a nation
show examples
has.
This
not only allows
to plan
Change the verb form
planning
show examples
for large-scale projects but
also
provides resources to care for an older generation. Nowadays, many highly developed nations are in the opposite
situation
. Their population is getting older and they are struggling to find resources to fund the pension system and
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
support the growing number of older
people
. While it is beneficial for a government to have a large number of
people
who are able to work, one downside that these countries might have is the lack of experienced
people
. If we look at many organizations we will often see more older
people
who are occupying leadership roles. If a nation has a shortage of senior leaders for any reason, it will naturally affect the quality of
their
Change the word
the
show examples
organizations'
Change noun form
organization's
show examples
decisions. To conclude, in my point of view the advantages of having a larger share of young adults
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweigh
the possible disadvantages. To have a large workforce is a major benefit that a country might have and an important condition not only to plan for
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
future
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but to bring it into reality.
Submitted by j8d3 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: