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Band 4

Human activity has damaged the environment all around the world. Some people think that humans cannot stop damaging the planet where as other believe that we can alter our behaviour and prevent future damage. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#activity #environment #world #people #humans #planet #behaviour #future #damage
Environmental
damage
such
 as
pollution
,
forest
Correct word choice
and forest
show examples
destroying
Replace the word
destruction
show examples
 are
global
Add an article
a global
the global
show examples
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
now a days
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
. But
people
 should interact with
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
 to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
 their
day to
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
show examples
day
 life. Human activities become
major
Add an article
a major
show examples
thread
Correct your spelling
threat
show examples
 to our planet. Some
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
 suppose these activities can not stop contrary others think if we can alter our behaviour
then
 future
damage
 will be decreased. Today, the
world
 depends on industries.
On
Change preposition
In
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other words,we live in
industrial
Correct article usage
an industrial
show examples
world
. So most of the
people
in
Change preposition
around
show examples
globe
Correct article usage
the globe
show examples
depends
Change the verb form
depend
show examples
 on their salaries.Industries create job
oppotunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 and
people
 work in
factories
 for their
livinghood
Correct your spelling
living hood
Livingood
.Most of these
factories
 directly connect
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 environmental
pollution
.
For instance
,air
pollution
,light
pollution
,water
pollution
 as well as forest
destroying
Replace the word
destruction
show examples
.There is
good
Change the article
a good
show examples
 example
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
contribution
Add an article
the contribution
a contribution
show examples
 of
people
 to environmental
pollution
,
last
 covid 19 era most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
factories
 closed for nearly one year.So researchers identified ozone layer has
rebuild
Change the verb form
rebuilt
show examples
 its
damage
 but the argument is, the government can not close
factories
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
 all economic system in the
world
 depends on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
industries.Just as they argue there is nothing to do with activities that
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 damaged the
environment
.
On the other hand
,some nature lovers and communities argue, when we are trying to reduce
damage
then
 we can make
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
world
 in future.There are so many unidentifying diseases,
illnesses
Correct word choice
and illnesses
show examples
 today. Scientists suppose most of them are caused by
environmrntal
Correct your spelling
environmental
pollution
.
For example
, skin cancer patients are increasing
day
 by
day
.One of the reasons is bad
sunlights
Fix the agreement mistake
sunlight
show examples
 because they have reached to
world
Add an article
the world
show examples
 through
damaged
Add an article
the damaged
show examples
 ozone layer. Forest
destroying
Replace the word
destruction
show examples
 is
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
show examples
 effect
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
diversity
Add an article
the diversity
a diversity
show examples
 of animals and plants.So we should do everything to protect our
environment
 for
future
Correct article usage
the future
show examples
. As if it is so tiny effect. The
last
 red
indian
Change the capitalization
Indian
show examples
 leader once said that there is no nature,
there
Correct word choice
and there
show examples
 is no human.
In contrast
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
there is no industrial
world
 there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 no developments.So we should live wisely with our
environment
.We should
develope
Correct your spelling
develop
 our countries while
protect
Change the verb form
protecting
show examples
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
Submitted by thashik3 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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