Some people believe that professional workers such as doctors and teachers should be paid more than sports and entertainment personalities.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some individuals consider that masters of their work like
teachers
Use synonyms
and
doctors
Use synonyms
should have more salary than other professions
such
Linking Words
us
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
sport and
entertaiment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
personalities. I agree with
this
Linking Words
opinion,because,I think
teachers
Use synonyms
and
doctors
Use synonyms
have various
distribution
Use synonyms
for our society and for
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
generation.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
job
Add an article
the job
show examples
of
medicine
Replace the word
medical
show examples
workers
Use synonyms
and pedagogs is one of the most stressful
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
.Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
both of these professions require communication and learning skills.Following
Correct pronoun usage
this by
show examples
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
they need to teach and treat a lot of
people
Use synonyms
and give them health and education.
For example
Linking Words
,
famous
Correct article usage
the famous
show examples
scientist Al-Farabi is
also
Linking Words
a teacher,he
tought
Correct your spelling
taught
thought
many
people
Use synonyms
and had
significiant
Correct your spelling
significant
distribution
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
our
world's
Change the noun form
worlds
world
show examples
develop
Replace the word
development
show examples
.
Change preposition
To Summurise
show examples
Summurise
Correct your spelling
Summarise
Summarize
the information,
jobs
Correct article usage
the jobs
show examples
of
teachers
Use synonyms
and
doctors
Use synonyms
are
more heavy
Replace the words
heavier
show examples
than others,they suffer from stress and fight
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
the death,while
sportman
Correct your spelling
sportsman
playing
Wrong verb form
play
show examples
a game and have
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
fun.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
teachers
Use synonyms
and
doctors
Use synonyms
have higher
distribution
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
our world than other professions.
For example
Linking Words
,medicine
workers
Use synonyms
help to survive to more than
million
Correct article usage
a million
show examples
people
Use synonyms
every day,among these
people
Use synonyms
can be
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
and
entertaiment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
workers
Use synonyms
even one of their
friend
Fix the agreement mistake
friends
show examples
.Despite
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
all of these
doctors
Use synonyms
carry out the operation which they need to do and give
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
various
people
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,I desire that
medicine
Replace the word
medical
show examples
workers
Use synonyms
and pedagogs need to be paid more than
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
and
entertaiment
Correct your spelling
entertainment
personalities,because,they have higher
distribution
Use synonyms
for our society and world.
Submitted by zhadyra.serikbayeva2016 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Professional workers
  • Societal contribution
  • Scarcity
  • Market forces
  • Consumer demand
  • Role models
  • Economic impact
  • Revenue generation
  • Fair compensation
  • Social equity
  • Intrinsic rewards
  • Job satisfaction
  • Media rights
  • Merchandise sales
  • Public figures
What to do next:
Look at other essays: