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Band 4.5

Nowadays, a great deal of educational devices has been equipped in university. Primarily, it is believed that computers have been coming to play a crucial role in great lectures. In my opinion, having computer equipment will always have not only benefits in education but also drawbacks in studying

#devices #university #computers #role #lectures #computer #equipment #education
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Due to
the
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apply
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Globalisation,
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use
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the use
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 of
technology driven
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technology-driven
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devises
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devices
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 has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
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increased in day-to-day
use
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,
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moreover
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,moreover
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 these techniques are playing a vital role in the life of people,
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however
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,however
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computer's have
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computer has
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 their own demerits as well. I will discuss
the
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apply
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both views in
below mentioned
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below-mentioned
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 paragraphs
To begin
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 with the benefits, in
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the modern-era
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modern-era
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modern era
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, usage of hand-handled devices has
been
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apply
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drastically
rise
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rising
risen
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.
Firstly
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 with the help of electronic-devices work can be done accurately and in
less
Add an article
a less
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 time-consuming manner,
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moreover
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,moreover
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 these devices
saves
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save
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 our time for doing
the
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apply
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repetitive jobs, as we need in traditional schooling methods. I have observed that in the past, we used to learn mathematical tables by reciting them again and again,
however
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 now
this
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 becomes easy for kids to watch their favourite
cartoon
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cartoons
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 and learn important points simultaneously.
Hence
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Use synonyms
Use
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the Use
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 of Computer-Equipment benefited
community
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the community
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 at large.
On the other hand
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,
Firstly
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, Technology has converted us in
such
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 a way that now people don't want to do
any thing
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anything
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by
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on
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 their own.
Secondly
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, Kids are not using these hand-handled devices for their studies whereas they are using these for their enjoyment only.
Therefore
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 these
Plateforms
Correct your spelling
Platforms
 are
some time
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sometimes
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 becomes a major concern due to the
availabilty
Correct your spelling
availability
 of wrong content and
least
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the least
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 security, because it is not possible for the parents to keep an eye on the kids
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
. According to the survey published in the
newspaper
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,newspaper
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 more than
80-percent
Correct your spelling
80 percent
 of the students are watching movies almost half of their day time which adversely
affecting
Wrong verb form
affects
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 the eye-sight of the adoselent.
Therefore
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 Computer-Devices
use
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 should be restricted. To summarise, Computer-advancement
provide
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provides
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 us
the
Add the preposition
with the
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 power to achieve any height but again
responsibilty
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 is in our hands, for
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this
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,this
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 we should take into account the balance required for using these for
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the knowledgeable
a knowledgeable
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knowledgeable
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knowledge
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 purpose only.
Submitted by cameenu1708 on

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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