IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Governments suits paid money on railways whether than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement?

#governments #suits #money #railways #roads
Many people nowadays see governments
buliding
Correct your spelling
building
railways
 for the citizens around their cities and
paid
Wrong verb form
paying
show examples
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
attentions
Correct your spelling
attention
show examples
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
roads
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
if compared
railways
Change preposition
to railways
show examples
 and
roads
eveyone
Correct your spelling
everyone
 in the city can see that
railways
 clearly are worth
than
Correct quantifier usage
more than
show examples
roads
 significantly.
To begin
 with,in my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 I agree with governments to
bulid
Correct your spelling
build
 more
railways
 because
on
Add the comma(s)
,on
show examples
 one hand, there can make facilities
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 people who
lives
Correct subject-verb agreement
live
show examples
 in town.
For example
,
railways
 can reduce the distance in the city and can due to people around here
have
Wrong verb form
having
show examples
 more
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
 but
on the other hand
,
bulid
Correct your spelling
build
railways
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
used much
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money and used much
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
force to
constructed
Wrong verb form
construct
show examples
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
compared with
bulid
Correct your spelling
build
roads
.
However
,I think in the long
terms
Fix the agreement mistake
term
show examples
 that will
good
Add a missing verb
be good
show examples
 for citizens in the city.
Next
,I will talk about
roads
 even though I said
railways
 are better than
roads
 but I
did'
Correct your spelling
didn't
did
t
 say to
use
 all time and cash on
railways
 because
railways
 are one of
solutions
Add an article
the solutions
show examples
 to help citizens in town but not all of
solutions
Add an article
the solutions
show examples
 anythings have profits and drawbacks so in my opinion don'
t
use
 one thing to solve all problem.
For instance
,
sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
roads
 are useful and can transfer things
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 easier than
railways
 because
railways
are
Change the verb form
are used
are using
show examples
use
time
Add an article
the time
show examples
 to construct and specific so there can'
t
use
 in
sometime
Replace the word
some time
show examples
 but
roads
 can do it. In conclusion,I strongly agree with
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
government
Change noun form
government's
show examples
paid
Wrong verb form
paying
show examples
 money
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 building
railways
 but I suggest to
bulid
Correct your spelling
build
 more
roads
 too because
that
Change the determiner
those
show examples
 two things
are have
Change the verb form
have
show examples
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 profits and
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 drawbacks government can pay attention to
railways
 but don'
t
forgot
Wrong verb form
forget
show examples
roads
Correct article usage
the roads
show examples
.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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