IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that famous people can help international aid organisations to draw attention to important problems. Others believe that the celebrities can make the problems seem less important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #aid #organisations #attention #celebrities
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While it has been argued that eminent
people
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 can collaborate with international aid centres to highlight major
problems
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, some
people
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 claim that
celebrities
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 diminish the significance of these issues. I agree with the former ones and I explain both views in detail as follows: I am of the opinion that famous
people
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 play a crucial role in increasing awareness among nations about the prevailing
problems
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 all over the world. Being followed by a myriad of individuals on social networking websites or applications, these
celebrities
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 facilitate the flow and dissemination of information. Since proponents of famous
people
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 imitate their path and live as prestigious
people
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, every main message on their social profile would call
people
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’s attention to major issues. To illustrate, when they tweet something online, a wide range of
people
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 all around the world will be cognisant forthwith.
However
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, the
second
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 group believe that
celebrities
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 have a reverse effect on issues and make them seem less major. Their reason is that life of these
people
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 is constantly controlled by the paparazzi and reporters;
therefore
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, if they have some antisocial behaviour, the magnitude of the current main
problems
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 will be belittled.
For instance
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, a prominent person who advertises environmental
problems
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 but uses non-recyclable materials as a routine never is enough reliable to call attention to major concerns. In my view,
such
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 organisations are aware of these
problems
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 and choose prominent
people
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 with good professional records. To sum up, I side with advocates of cooperation between
celebrities
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 and international aid centres as they are well-known among
people
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 and their day-to-day life is perused by the public.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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