IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many people today would argue that cinemas are becoming irrelevant due to new streaming services. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #cinemas #services
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There appears to be an argument about the phenomenon of streaming providers replacing
cinemas
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. In
this
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 essay, I agree with the statement since the services are getting more popular lately and the
business
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 has grown larger to provide
more
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a more
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 seamless experience.
To begin
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 with, watching movies on online platforms is heavily common these days to the point people are getting used to the alternative. It all started during the pandemic era between 2020 to 2022 when
cinemas
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 were closed and everyone was forced to switch from it to another
option
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in
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for
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 enjoying films.
Moreover
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, the audience has started to reap the benefit
such
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 as less effort to go out to watch the show and a cheaper
option
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 for cinema tickets. The phenomenon can be seen through both the number and eagerness of people going to the place which is decreasing significantly. The change is
also
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 supported by the growing
business
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 of the
option
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. Collaborations are conducted with more and bigger parties to support the services' continuity.
As a result
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, many online platforms have emerged as Netflix, HBO Go, and Amazon Prime to widen the options and accessibility becomes easier with mobile applications and uncomplicated payment methods. Other than that, the relationship between the
business
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 and the film producers have made the gap between
cinemas
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 and the alternative getting smaller to the point human can enjoy the newly released arts through the internet. In conclusion, though
cinemas
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 have been the main choice to watch films for many years, they are now gradually being irrelevant due to the popularity of streaming activity since people get more accustomed to the other
option
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 and the fact that the growing
business
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 makes it easier to access and enjoy.
Submitted by hpanduhimawan on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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