The obesity rate among teenagers has increased dramatically in many developed countries. discuss some possible reasons for this problem and suggest solutions.

#obesity #rate #teenagers #countries

The unpredictable progress of society brings several notable notions with them which are interconvertible the rising tendency of health is one of them. The rate of

obesity

in children's increased fast in many big countries. To

this

, the essay will

further

elaborate on the reasons and give some remedies for it. Without any qualms, nowadays the increasing number of fast

food

has a significant influence on

obesity

and other health-related problems.

This

means

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

The majority of teenagers prefer fast

food

on a daily basis which is prepared with a high quantity of oil and other ingredients which effects.

For instance

, by consuming fast

food

teenagers face problems like gain weight, high blood pressure,

obesity

, and so on ,

thus

, they

also

feel frustrated and ill. On the other school of thought, to reduce the rate of

obesity

everyone needs to avoid junk

food

. To justify it, they need to eat more green vegetables and fruits. To elaborate on it, parents should encourage children to consume homemade

food

which is made of fresh vegetables. ,

Moreover

government should need to ban a variety of fast

food

As a result

, they will help teenagers to reduce their

obesity

levels. In conclusion,

although

, fast

food

is prepared in a few minutes and saves an individual's time , we cannot ignore its drawbacks

Submitted by prabhgill1621 on Fri Dec 30 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

218 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

dramatically
prevalence
addictive
sedentary lifestyle
screen time
gadgets
exertion
awareness
balanced diet
incorporate
nutritional education
facilitating
impose
regulations
restricting
promote

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The obesity rate among teenagers has increased dramatically in many developed countries. discuss some possible reasons for this problem and suggest solutions.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that the academic success of students depends on good teachers at schools. Others think that it depends on the attitude and determination of the students. Discuss both these views and give your opinion

Differences between countries become less evident each year. Nowadays, all over the world, people share the same fashions, advertising, brands, eating habits and TV channels. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages of this?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that social media sites, such as Facebook or Twitter, have a negative impact on young people and their ability to form personal relationships. Others believe that these sites bring people together in a beneficial way.