IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

SOME PEOPLE FEEL THAT THERE SHOUD BE A FIXED PUNISHMENT FOR EACH TYPE OF CRIME. OTHERS FOT THAT THE CIRUMSTANCES OF AN OFFENCE SHOULD BE TAKEN IN TO ACCOUNT WHEN DECIDING ON A PUNISHMENT. DISCUSS BOTHE SIDES AND GIVE YOUR OWN OPINION.

#people #shoud #punishment #type #crime #fot #cirumstances #offence #account #bothe
Crime is a pervasive issue in many societies.The conventional trial process is quite lengthy and has a huge burden on the state's resources. For
this
 reason, many people hold the view that fixed punishment is the solution, while others believe that intention behind the offence should be considered prior to punishment. I will examine both views and explain why I think petty crimes should have fixed punishments,
however
, heinous ones should be dealt with individually.
To begin
 with, despite the lengthy justice system and strain on the state's resources, heinous offences should, always, be trialled case by case. Serious offences by a serial criminal and by a common man cannot be punished
similarly
. Homicide,
for instance
, committed in self-defence should have different implications from the murder by a serial killer. The former is committed to saving oneself while the latter is committed to the sake of pleasure.
Therefore
, the intention of the crime should be mandatory prior to awarding a sentence.
On the other hand
, petty violations should have fixed sentences to save time and resources. A fixed and instant punishment will not only reduce recidivism but may
also
 deter amateurs. Take punishments for minor misdemeanours as an example. Regardless of the amount attained by any pickpocket after the offence, they should be incarcerated for a specific amount of time. In order to avoid hectic legal procedures and strain on government machinery, all petty ill-doings: picking a pocket, theft of food, shoplifting and so on, should be penalised by fixed punishments. In conclusion, In my opinion, a holistic approach ought to be taken for all horrific major crimes while minor crimes should be handled in a more pragmatic process.
Submitted by kamran_lashari81 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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