IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Some people think that schools should select pupils according to their academic abilities, while others believe that it is better to have pupils with different abilities study together. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #schools #pupils #abilities #study
It is
Correct pronoun usage
Is
show examples
 thought
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
some
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
that
pupils
 should study together
by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their own interests, yet there are others who believe that
pupils
 should
Add a missing verb
be seperated
show examples
seperated
Correct your spelling
separated
 according to different
abilities
 and study with other
pupils
 who have
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 interests. On the one hand, educating
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
who
Change the pronoun
whom
show examples
hava
Correct your spelling
have
 similar
abilities
 give
pupils
 different types of perspectives or diversity. Exchange or seeing ideas gives
pupils
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
such
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
perspectives about their own subject.
For instance
, if a student were interested in sculpture,
this
 student would
be affect
Change the verb form
be affected
show examples
 by his/her friends who
interest
Add a missing verb
are interest
show examples
 in arts. There
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
also
 some kind of negative effects
such
 as especially in Turkey, some
abilities
 can be much more important than the other subjects and
this
 can be a problem among the students.
Besides
 that, as a positive effect, interaction with people
who
Change the pronoun
whom
show examples
 same
interest
Fix the agreement mistake
interests
show examples
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
 you will raise our ability. On the other side of the argument say that
pupils
 should be in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 same classes
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
 other
pupils
 who have different academic
abilities
.
Seperating
Correct your spelling
Separating
 all the subjects will be a problem in terms of
fundation
Correct your spelling
foundation
 because
built
Wrong verb form
building
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
different places
fort he
Correct your spelling
for the
show examples
 subjects or recruiting teachers
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the job can
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
cause
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
economic problems. If all the
pupils
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 interests
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 similar topic,
whereas
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
teachers give better attention to every
pupils
Change to a singular noun
pupil
show examples
. Above all,
pupils
 who have
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
abilities
 can feed and learn from each other. In my opinion, I agree
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that
pupils
 should
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
study together with
pupils
 who have
same
Add an article
the same
show examples
interest
Fix the agreement mistake
interests
show examples
.
Submitted by cerngrl3500 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: