IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

#professionals #doctors #teachers #countries #work #situation
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Nowadays,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
professionals
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
undeveloped
countries
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as teachers and doctors
are prefer
Change the verb form
prefer
show examples
 to live and work
more
Change preposition
in more
show examples
 developed
Use synonyms
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss what is the mean causes of
this
Linking Words
 issue and give some examples and solutions. In fact,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 with high
education
Use synonyms
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
living their own poor
country
Use synonyms
 has many advantages for
individual
Add an article
the individual
an individual
show examples
 person.
For example
Linking Words
, there is more possible to earn
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
 salary, improve their life situation and chance to enhance their quality of
education
Use synonyms
 level. But their own
country
Use synonyms
 suffers
lot's
Change the noun form
lots
lot
show examples
 of problems.
For
Linking Words
instance
Add a comma
,instance
show examples
 native
people
Use synonyms
 can't take higher
education
Use synonyms
 and health benefits that are really crucial.
Therefore
Linking Words
 government should demand
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
professionals who leave their
countries
Use synonyms
 to arrive
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
 own
country
Use synonyms
 after
defined
Add an article
a defined
the defined
show examples
 period.
Moreover
Linking Words
, It hugely affects to development of the
country
Use synonyms
 by experienced
people
Use synonyms
 leaving their
countries
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, the
countries
Use synonyms
 like Bangladesh and Pakistan is
independent
Add an article
an independent
show examples
country
Use synonyms
, but still
under-developed
Correct your spelling
underdeveloped
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 because of their infrastructure.
Thus
Linking Words
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 should take
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 wage system and enhance the environment of their working situation. To conclude the fact that
high
Replace the word
highly
show examples
 educated
people
Use synonyms
 staying foreign
countries
Use synonyms
 to live and work effected bad consequences
Change preposition
on that
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
education
Use synonyms
 and health system
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their own
country
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
 government should give solutions to tackle
Linking Words
this problems
Change the determiner
this problem
these problems
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 deprives the citizens of good teachers, sensible
health care
Correct your spelling
healthcare
show examples
 workers and expert engineers, ultimately leading to less chance of advancement for these
countries
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by Naran on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Brain drain
  • Skilled professionals
  • Healthcare systems
  • Education systems
  • Economic growth
  • Dependency on foreign aid
  • Social inequality
  • Quality healthcare
  • Quality education
  • Retain talent
  • International cooperation
  • Sustainable growth
  • Scholarships
  • Professional development
  • Remote work capabilities
  • Local research funding
What to do next:
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