IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Scientific innovation is always a positive thing and should be encouraged. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons to support your answer.

It is argued that scientific
inventions
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 have a positive influence on modern life
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 these developing
inventions
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 should be supported.
Although
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 several scientific innovations can provide a positive thing for humans, they
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also
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can also
show examples
could
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apply
show examples
lead to a negative impact. The most compelling reason why scientific innovation has beneficial aspects for human life is that it leads to some creative discoveries to
allow
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make
show examples
 human life easier and healthier. An air fryer is one of the
inventions
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 that can be used as an example of recent
inventions
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 that enable
people
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 to put less effort
to cook
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into cooking
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 healthy food without using too much oil.
This
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invention
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also
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 lets
people
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 save their energy to cook because
people
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 just have to wait for
food
Correct article usage
the food
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 until cooked.
Therefore
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, if an air fryer
is
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had
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 not
invented
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been invented
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, it is likely that
people
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 would have difficulty cooking fried healthy food.
In contrast
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,
negative
Correct article usage
the negative
show examples
 impacts of the scientific
invention
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 may be noted. These
inventions
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 may
use
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be used
show examples
 as dangerous weapons in several
countries
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 and may lead to war
including
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, including
show examples
 the creation of nuclear weapons and atomic weapons in some
countries
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 may
use
Wrong verb form
be used
show examples
for
Change preposition
by
show examples
 some
countries
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 to attack opposing
countries
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. If some scientists had not created a nuclear weapon, Russia and Ukraine probably would not have gone to war.
To sum up
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, it is undeniable that scientific innovation may let
people
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 live in convenient ways
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such
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, such
show examples
 as the discovery of cooking utensil technology.
However
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, a drawback of
this
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invention
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 should be considered
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such
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, such
show examples
 as the
invention
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 of a weapon that may
use
Wrong verb form
be used
show examples
 to attack other
countries
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.

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coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supports it well with examples. Try to stick to one main point per paragraph.
task achievement
Explain more about how some scientific inventions can be harmful and give clear examples. This can help strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Make sure your introduction clearly states your position on the topic. A strong thesis statement will help guide your essay.
task achievement
You provided a real example (air fryer) to support your point about the benefits of scientific innovation.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear beginning and end, which is good for helping readers understand your overall message.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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