IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The crime nowadays is decreasing compared to the past due to advance in technology which can help prevent and solve crime.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#crime #advance #technology
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In the past, the
crime
Use synonyms
 rate is very high.
On the contrary
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, Secure and solvable
crime
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 can be helped by developing
technology
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, so the offence is decreasing related to the past. From my point of view, I agree with
this
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 statement. The reason will be extended in the following paragraph. Before, The conclusion is reached.
To begin
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 with, Developing
technology
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 makes officers' equipment better that easier to catch a criminal.
Furthermore
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,
cloud-system
Correct your spelling
cloud systems
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 sync the data of criminals together in one device.
For example
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, laptops can be put in police officers' cars. They can use GPS to find criminal vehicles and information about criminals at the same time, making it easier to do their duty.
As a result
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, the
crime
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 rate is decreasing because people who aim to commit a
crime
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 find it challenging to do it.
Moreover
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, camera
technology
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such
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 as CCTV photographs has helped in various ways to detect thieves and their activities.
For instance
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 ,
Arm
Replace the word
armed
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 robbers can be seen in CCTV footage even when they are not aware because Cameras are capable of tracing every movement and activity
that is
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 made at places
they
Rephrase
where they
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 were installed.
In particular
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, there was a case of murder reported
last
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 week that took place in Anambra State, Awka to be precise. After some days, the victims were arrested by police.
Therefore
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, CCTV cameras have the ability to trace and discover criminal activities.
Consequently
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, prevents them from subsequent robbery
To conclude
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. I agree with
this
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 cause. When
technology
Use synonyms
 developed, it was easier for an officer to work with their duty
Submitted by kee.peter23 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supporting details that relate to the main idea.
task response
Address the prompt more fully by providing examples that are directly relevant to the topic and develop your ideas more thoroughly.
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