Advanced technology has brought many beneficial changes to the world. However, some old people today struggle with the use of technologies such as mobile phones and the Internet. How can the elderly benefit from using advanced technologies? How can the elderly be encouraged to use consumer electronics more often?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
These days a major part of our society assumes that cutting-edge gadgets have made our world more modern.
Although
, the elderly still cannot handle using phones and other electronic devices in everyday life.
However
, most experts consider that it can improve their lives. I am in strong agreement with
this
consideration. The following essay will discuss why the young generation ought to help elder people with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Internet usage and why it could be advantageous for them.
To begin
with, nowadays, it is popular among youth to relocate abroad.
Nonetheless
, their parents and grandparents stay in their home countries.
Therefore
, the Internet is helpful to still keep in touch despite a long
distance
Fix the agreement mistake
distances
show examples
by sending photos and having online calls without paying a vast amount of money.
Secondly
, most state-of-the-art technologies have a voice assistant which can tell old individuals about the weather or order a taxi for them, because usually it is hard for them to use apps.
Finally
, it is useful to read news on your phone
instead
of newspapers, where you cannot zoom in
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
text.
Moreover
, if a senior has a TV, it makes his life more comfortable.
Consequently
, those benefits should be incentives for pensioners to attempt to use high technologies in their routine.
Besides
this
, IT professionals must provide user-friendly programmes which have a simple menu and bigger letters. To conclude about the aforementioned arguments, I firmly believe that modern
vidgets
Correct your spelling
widgets
are essential to include not only in
teenagers
Change noun form
teenagers'
teenager's
show examples
and grown-ups' lives
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but in old people's as well.
Submitted by crespo_el on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: