Eating too much sugar is harmful for health. Some people think that it is a government responsibility to limit people’s sugar consumption, while others think that it is individuals responsibility to limit the amount of sugar they eat. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Drastic effects on
health
can
been
Change the verb form
be
show examples
seen in those individuals who consume high amounts of
sugar
in their diet. Many think that Government should make some laws to limit
sugar
intake to protect
people
's
health
while
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
think that one should be responsible for their own
health
. In
this
essay, I will discuss
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both views and will give my opinion. Some
people
believe that Government should make policies regarding
intake
Correct article usage
the intake
show examples
of
sugar
so that their citizens will be healthy.
Additionally
, money should be invested in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
awareness programs about
ill
Correct article usage
the ill
show examples
effects of too much
sugar
consumption.
For example
, if the
people
of
nation
Correct article usage
a nation
show examples
will be healthy
then
only that nation can progress. By educating the
people
, serious
health
conditions can be prevented which ultimately
reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
show examples
the stress on
health
Add an article
the health
show examples
care system. On the other side,
people
should be responsible for their
health
and can make choices which will promote their
heath
Correct your spelling
health
show examples
. Food is the basic need of every individual and these days
people
have tremendous information available to use to make healthy choices.
People
should not be forced to do something. In conclusion, it is the shared responsibility of both
Government
Correct article usage
the Government
show examples
and
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
to control their
sugar
intake so that
people
have healthy lives and live longer.
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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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