IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The animal species are becoming extinct due to human activities on land and in sea .What are the reasons and solutions?

#species #activities #land #sea
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It has been noted that the growing number of various living creatures are at
the
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apply
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risk of vanishing thanks to
the
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apply
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mankind. The underlying reasons and ways to deal with
such
Linking Words
 a problem will be discussed in the following paragraphs. One obvious cause of
extinction
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the extinction
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 of different animals
is seem
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seems
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 to be industrialization. With a view to
construct
Wrong verb form
constructing
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 new premises, factories and other facilities, used for accommodating
needs
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the needs
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 of humans, vast territories of the land are undergoing clearing processes.
Linking Words
This
Correct determiner usage
These
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 lands usually serve as a living
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
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 for various animal species.
As a result
Linking Words
, animals become devoid of their habitats, which renders them extinct.
Moreover
Linking Words
, climate change exerts a detrimental impact
upon
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on
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 several species, that are unable to adapt to the shifts
of
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in
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 temperature. Arctic bears and penguins,
for example
Linking Words
, cannot endure even a slight effect of global warming. Turning to possible ways of tackling
this
Linking Words
 issue,
first
Linking Words
 of all, it is crucial to ensure that
animal's
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animals'
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 natural habitats are preserved.
This
Linking Words
 can be done
through
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by
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 finding alternative lands to the areas, where different creatures live.
For instance
Linking Words
,
instead
Linking Words
 of clearing forests in order to introduce novel accommodations, people can reconstruct old buildings located within the cities.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
reducing
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by reducing
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 our use of fossil fuels and our contribution to
the
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apply
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carbon emission, we would be able to alleviate the situation
with
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of
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the
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apply
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global warming, which in turn would have a positive impact on both, humans and animals. To recapitulate, animal extinction
seem
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seems
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 to be a consequence of the loss of habitats, and climate change.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 issue can be addressed, by
conservation
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the conservation
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 of lands, which belong
other
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to other
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 species and trying to deal with another serious problem, namely
the
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apply
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global warming .
Submitted by sevinchazimova11 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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