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Writing Samples /
Band 5

Many governments think that economic grow is their most important goal. Some people, however, thinks that other type of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#governments #people #type #progress #country
Economics is a powerful tool and it determines the country's wealth. Some
people
 harbour a belief that the country should concentrate on economic growth, while other
people
 argue that
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
 to focus
the
Change preposition
on the
show examples
nation
Change noun form
nation's
show examples
 problems than economic growth. In
this
 essay, I will elaborate more detail from both views and
thus
 lead to a logical conclusion. There
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 adequate evidence
Correct pronoun usage
that are
show examples
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 obtainable
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 substantiated reasons. The top-notch concrete reason is many countries is the primary focus to achieve the economic target. To fulfil the basic demands of the citizen by providing job opportunities, encouraging innovative ideas to implement things in a better way, and better infrastructure.
Moreover
, it enhances
chance
Add an article
the chance
show examples
 to build a new
concret
Correct your spelling
concrete
 between two countries by importing
trades
Fix the agreement mistake
trade
show examples
 to gain
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
profit from it.
For instance
, China's economic growth rate drastically increased over the past years by focusing on
nation's
Correct article usage
the nation's
show examples
 wealth.Needless to say, all these points stand in good stead. What is known as half full for
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
 may appear
empty
Change preposition
as empty
show examples
 half for some
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
 So
people
in general
Add the comma(s)
, in general,
show examples
tends
Correct subject-verb agreement
tend
show examples
 to distinguish that other things
also
 need to consider as
equal
Add an article
an equal
show examples
 priority. A pivotal aspect of
this
 argument is that
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
 became threats to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
entire nations.
Besides
,
increasing
Add an article
an increasing
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 number of crimes in
urban
Add an article
an urban
the urban
show examples
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
. The Government need to focus on those issues to find
feasible
Add an article
a feasible
show examples
 solution to tackle these problems.
Hence
, it's apparent why many
people
supporting
Wrong verb form
support
show examples
this
 trend. In recapitulation, I reiterate that there are innumerable strong factors supporting that
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
issues and
safety
Correct article usage
the safety
show examples
 of
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
also
 need to give equal priority as same like
economic
Add an article
the economic
show examples
 sector. By owning to these stated reasons,
I'm
Unnecessary verb
I
show examples
 profoundly
belief
Replace the word
believe
show examples
 that developing countries would definitely grow by giving
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
equal priority.
Submitted by dhivyaravi0396 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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