IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoiding change. Others, however, think that change is always a good thing. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #lives #change
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Many
people
Use synonyms
 like doing the same
things
Use synonyms
. It is because you don't have to change many
thing
Change to a plural noun
things
show examples
 about your
life
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. Some
people
Use synonyms
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
like doing
challege
Correct your spelling
challenge
task
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tasks
show examples
 and looking for way more
interested
Replace the word
interesting
show examples
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
 of
life
Use synonyms
. I will explain my point of view on
this
Linking Words
 both
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
. In our
Use synonyms
life
Add a comma
,life
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 we spent almost 8 hours a day
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 work even in some
people
Use synonyms
 spent more than that. That
mean
Change the verb form
means
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 our job
involve
Change the verb form
involves
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in
Change preposition
apply
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working the same
things
Use synonyms
 for the rest of
life
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 or said routine work in some cases. Some
people
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 like their job
faces
Correct word choice
and faces
show examples
 new problems every day so
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
they love changing. it is not wrong that most
people
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keen
Add a missing verb
are keen
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 to
spent
Wrong verb form
spend
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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time in
comfort
Add an article
the comfort
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 zone so they don't adapt or try to
changing
Change the form of the verb
change
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any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
things
Use synonyms
 that much but I see
this
Linking Words
 kind of
life
Use synonyms
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
 boring. Your brain will
Add a missing verb
be slighly
show examples
slighly
Correct your spelling
slightly
 regressive and dead in the end
bacause
Correct your spelling
because
 it is not
develope
Correct your spelling
develop
developed
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the brain of a group of
people
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 like change
will
Correct word choice
and will
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 get
developement
Correct your spelling
development
 that a result
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 learning progress in
everyday
Add an article
the everyday
an everyday
show examples
task
Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
show examples
 we found. Another point is
chang
Correct your spelling
change
show examples
 is the way you find yourself. If you spent your time doing the same old
things
Use synonyms
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
how
Correct your spelling
now
show examples
 that you know that what you
Add a missing verb
have done
show examples
done
Change the form of the verb
do
show examples
 is what you want to
Add a missing verb
do.
show examples
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
Life
Use synonyms
 is about trying new
things
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. Maybe you can find a new hobby from what you try once. I encourage everyone to try new
things
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 and except
chang
Correct your spelling
change
show examples
 because
this
Linking Words
 world is changing
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 if we don't
adaping
Correct your spelling
adapting
 we
wil
Correct your spelling
will
 not
ready
Add a missing verb
be ready
show examples
 to live among
new
Add an article
the new
show examples
 generation in
this
Linking Words
 world and that will be hard for your
life
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by joymaynig on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • status quo
  • stagnation
  • routine
  • comfort zone
  • predictability
  • specialization
  • innate
  • personal growth
  • adaptability
  • fast-paced
  • new horizons
  • equilibrium
  • progress
  • dynamic
  • transformation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: