IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people get into debt by buying they don’t need and can’t afford. What are the reasons for this behavior? What action can be taken to prevent from having this problem?

#people #debt #don’t #can’t #behavior #action
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Nowadays, is known that some people have started to suffer falling
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
debts
Fix the agreement mistake
debt
show examples
 because they
are not totally realize
Change the verb form
do not totally realize
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
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how many buyings are doing. After that,
this
Linking Words
 population can not repay the money back and they just can borrow
to
Change preposition
from
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 banks.
First
Linking Words
 of all, the biggest main reason
of
Change preposition
for
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this
Linking Words
 behaviour is that
this
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 community do not notice their expenditure.
For example
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, we know of a lot of younger spending cash with not necessary things like
play
Replace the word
playing
show examples
 games or other kinds of expensive
techonologies
Correct your spelling
technologies
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 group are not conscious
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the consequence that
this
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 will produce and for
this
Linking Words
 reason they are just buying and buying without thinking much.
For instance
Linking Words
, when the shops are starting to put
a
Change preposition
in a
show examples
lot of offers they can not resist
to
Change preposition
apply
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it. Indeed,
these
Correct determiner usage
the
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 public
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
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 not have
idea
Correct quantifier usage
any idea
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 about what they are doing with the coins.
Nevertheless
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, we can apply some preventions in order to help these younger.
Hence
Linking Words
, starting to teach in our schools about finance,
bussines
Correct your spelling
business
 and how
use
Add the particle
to use
show examples
 in a good way the money.
For instance
Linking Words
, we can see these subjects in a lot of universities because they are useful in order to work in companies in the future.
However
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, many do not want to follow
studing
Correct your spelling
studying
 and have finished their studies in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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secondary school. For
this
Linking Words
 reason, is very important starting to teach these
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
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 of subjects during
the
Correct article usage
apply
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secondary school. Many agree that we can find some benefits
doing
Change preposition
in doing
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 that.
Moreover
Linking Words
, if government start to apply some laws
upon
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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marketing, we will see big benefits,
such
Linking Words
 as, people can start to minister their money in a better way. To conclude, some people do not know how
use
Add the particle
to use
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cash correctly and we need to be preventive putting new subjects in our schools and with the
government
Change noun form
government's
show examples
 help.
Submitted by arianaganea92 on

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