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Writing Samples
Band 7

People feel that educational success is dependent on having a good teacher, others say it depends not the attitude of the student. Discuss both side and state your opinion*

#people #success #teacher #attitude #student #side #opinion*
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It is commonly believed that the student's performance in school depends on having a good teacher,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, some of them disagree with
this
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 concept. They think that it is the student's responsibility and they are capable
to succeed
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of succeeding
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 in their educational journey if they work hard.
However
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, in
this
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 essay, I will discuss both sides and illustrate my point of view as well. First of all, we can not underestimate the significance and importance of
teachers
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' attendance in class, especially with logical subjects that require practising lab experiences,
therefore
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, the only chance for
students
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 to succeed and pass
this
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 task is with
teachers
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' supervision and assistance, in fact, going through
this
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 process and operation alone could possibly lead to effecting their physical health by causing harm and danger.
Nevertheless
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,
teachers
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' attitudes and actions have a huge impact on the
students
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, a lot of them consider their
teachers
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 as role models,
hence
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,
this
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 is why
teachers
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 should be aware of the consequences of their actions, they are responsible for setting a good example to their
students
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.
However
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,
on the other hand
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,
students
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 should take part in the responsibility as well. They should care about building their career and improving themselves, they should care more than
teachers
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 actually. In fact, they will never succeed and achieve what they are hoping for, unless they devote their time and effort to studying and learning rather than being neglected,
for instance
Linking Words
, by hanging out with their friends every night. In my opinion, I think that in order to accomplish success in life and self-development, you have to work on yourself,
teachers
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 may help you with what you are struggling with, but it mostly depends on you. In conclusion, I think everyone is able to achieve success by fulfilling their potential. We all should be the best version of ourselves and work as hard as we can in order to upgrade our standard of living.
Submitted by Layanosama on

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extended
Task Response: The essay provides a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument and presents a clear opinion. However, more specific examples could be provided to support the points made.
extended
Coherence and Cohesion: The logical structure is generally well-maintained, and the ideas are presented in a clear and organized manner. However, the essay could benefit from stronger connections between ideas and more varied linking devices to improve coherence.
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