Subjects like arts, music and drama are more important than other subjects and therefore should be given more time in the calendar. Do you agree or disagree?

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Art

Use synonyms

subjects

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as drama, music, acting and dancing are fundamental that enrich our lives.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

majority

Correct article usage

the majority

show examples

of parents say schools must concentrate on teaching more academic

subjects

Use synonyms

, like math, science, history and literature. In my view, both

art

Use synonyms

and academic

subjects

Use synonyms

should be taught equally.

In contrast

Linking Words

, academic

subjects

Use synonyms

are more required when we get into

Remove the article

apply

show examples

higher education. Academic knowledge

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

main point in

academic

Add an article

the academic

show examples

world.

Consequently

Linking Words

, we should

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

assess our academic ability which we taught from academic

subjects

Use synonyms

, not

art

Use synonyms

subjects

Use synonyms

In other words

Linking Words

, for passing into university or high school owning educational intelligence is rather profitable .

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

show examples

result, many people send their children to educational

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

for studying academic

subjects

Use synonyms

deeply.

On the other hand

Linking Words

art

Use synonyms

subjects

Use synonyms

can improve

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

creativity and flexibility in people.

Painting

Add an article

The painting

A painting

show examples

which

include

Change the verb form

includes

show examples

relaxing and anti-stressing effects

makes

Change the verb form

make

show examples

you more relaxin that's why you feel

yourself

Remove the pronoun

apply

show examples

extremely softened.

Also

Linking Words

, in modern

life

Add a comma

,life

show examples

most of

Add an article

the works

show examples

works

Fix the agreement mistake

work

show examples

are done by robots replacing humans.

However

Linking Words

, in creativity people couldn't

be displace

Change the verb form

be displaced

show examples

by them. In conclusion,

art

Use synonyms

and academic

subjects

Use synonyms

should educate in a school's program in a balanced way.

Art

Use synonyms

classes should be encouraged as well as academic classes.

makemoneyizzy16Fri Jan 13 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

198 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Stimulate creativity
Critical thinking
Problem-solving skills
Emotional and social benefits
Self-expression
Cultural appreciation
Global citizenship
Balanced education
Diverse career paths
Stress reduction
Mental well-being
Talent nurturing
Substantial career opportunities
Arts-based subjects
Confidence building

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Subjects like arts, music and drama are more important than other subjects and therefore should be given more time in the calendar. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a job.On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Disscuss both sides and give your opinion.

In many countries, young people are finding it harder to get work. What do you think are the main causes of this? What effect might this have in the future?

Some people think it is more important to spend money on roads and motorways than on public transport systems such as railways and trams To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?