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Band 4.5

It is thought by some that it is better to live in a city while others believe that life is better in the country side. Discuss both sides and give your opinion

#city #life #country #side
Some
people
 say that
people
,
wholive
Correct your spelling
who live
 in a
city
,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can get more profit than
people
live
Correct pronoun usage
who live
show examples
 in
Add an article
the country
show examples
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
side
.
This
 essay aims to
erabolate
Correct your spelling
elaborate
 on the benefit of the aforementioned,
furthermore
 opposite statement, and I describe my opinion.
To begin
 with, if
people
 live in a
city
, they can spend
confotable
Correct your spelling
comfortable
 life relatively.
This
 is because, in the
city
, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 a lot of
shop
Fix the agreement mistake
shops
show examples
along
Correct your spelling
alongside
show examples
side
.
Thus
, we can go shopping and we can get as easier
what
Correct word choice
as
show examples
they
Correct pronoun usage
we
show examples
 want.
For example
,
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
a person, who
live
Change the verb form
lives
show examples
 in Tokyo, is don't have to take about 20 minutes to go shopping. They can go within 15
minitutes
Correct your spelling
minutes
 at least, so they can use more
time
 efficiently.
People
 cannot buy
our
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
time
, so saving
time
 is the most
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
 to
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
 in the
city
. When it comes to
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
side
,
people
 can save their money.
This
 is because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 price of land is quite lower than
a
Change preposition
in a
show examples
city
.
In addition
, if we live in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
side
, we can feel good nature
such
 as sunlight, wind, a river and so on without traffic noise.
For example
, if we live in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 countryside,
such
 as Tottori
prefecuture
Correct your spelling
prefecture
,
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 is the lowest population area in Japan, we can buy a big house
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
 in Tokyo.
This
 is the most profit to live in local
side
. From my perspective, it is good for me to live in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
side
. The reason is that my work is
IT
Change preposition
in IT
show examples
 engineer. So if I can use the internet, I can work
whrerever
Correct your spelling
wherever
 I go.
Moreover
, nowadays, developed online shopping.
Therefore
, I can buy products
what
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 I want even though go out as long as I can use the internet. Plots cost is the highest for human living, but If I live in
Correct article usage
the
show examples
countyside
Correct your spelling
countryside
, I can suppress it.
Therefore
 I cannot find out a drawback when I live in
Add an article
the country
show examples
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
side
. In conclusion, I reiterate my view that if
people
 live in a
city
, they can get more
time
 according to they will
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not have to go out
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
shopping. Whereas, if
people
 live in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
side
, they can save money.
In addition
, in my case, If I live in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
country
Correct your spelling
countryside
show examples
side
, I can spend
confortable
Correct your spelling
comfortable
 life because I do not have to go out originally.
Submitted by euler0279 on

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