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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The key solution for the environmental issues is for the current generation to live a less comfortable life to benefit future generations. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#generation #life #benefit #future #generations
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It is an inevitable truth that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental issues
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
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 become a controversial talk of
contemporary
Add an article
the contemporary
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 era. Since today has constructed diverse industrial companies and
also
Linking Words
 lifestyles, conditions cities, transportation... has changed,
consequently
Linking Words
 some believe that the key solution for
this
Linking Words
 problem is for the current generation to live a less comfortable life to benefit future people. The main agenda of the impending composition is to elaborate my certitude with befitting examples. Beginning with my rationalisation, there are multifarious points to stand with disagreement. The prominent one is government. What it means is they must control their consumption by ordering all of the departments or even forcing
to
Change preposition
apply
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them.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
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 they can reward
to
Change preposition
apply
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organisations,
people
Correct word choice
and people
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 by several various
work
Change to a plural noun
works
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such
Linking Words
 as
Add an article
a discount
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discount
Fix the agreement mistake
discounts
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 for payments or raising
income
Correct article usage
the income
show examples
Change preposition
of worker
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worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
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... .
Other
Correct quantifier usage
Another
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solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
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 to exemplify some civilized countries,
governments
Add a missing verb
is governments
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 can encourage or support scientists to manufacture machines,
new
Correct word choice
and new
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 technologies
for
Change preposition
to
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save
Change the form of the verb
saving
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 energy and
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
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. Exploring ahead the topic, one more worth noticing crux is cultural activities. To explicate
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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governments can increase the
cultural
Replace the word
culture
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 of being environmentally friendly,
for
Linking Words
instance
Add the comma(s)
,instance
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 make tv programs,
organize
Wrong verb form
organising
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 local groups as well as
present
Wrong verb form
presenting
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 subjects relevant to the environment in schools... .
In addition
Linking Words
 one
the
Change preposition
of the
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 most significant problems in every
countries
Change to a singular noun
country
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 is air pollution , for
this
Linking Words
 purpose government must increase public transportation by reducing fare , improving quantity bus, subway... . In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
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 based on
above
Add an article
the above
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 discussion, it is lucid that
less
Correct article usage
a less
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 comfortable life isn't efficient, both governments and people must collaborate, generally control consumption by scientific methods and
moreover
Linking Words
 develop
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
cultural
Replace the word
culture
show examples
 of being environmentally friendly.
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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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