IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

After being punished, many criminals continue to commit crimes. Why do some people commit crimes even after having been punished? What measures can be taken to tackle this problem.

#criminals #crimes #people #measures
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The problem of
offenders
Use synonyms
commit
Wrong verb form
committing
show examples
 crimes frequently is increasing by leaps and bounds . In my, opinion the main reason is that unemployment and corruption in courts. But, there are myriads of reasons
stand
Correct pronoun usage
that stand
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 behind
this
Linking Words
 dilemma. In
this
Linking Words
, essay we will address some quick fixes to solve
this
Linking Words
 affair.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, the
first
Linking Words
 and foremost reason is that the population is fascinated by criminals, maybe
offenders
Use synonyms
 maintain their character as
a
Correct article usage
apply
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terrible
guys
Correct the article-noun agreement
guy
show examples
 in the region. Another pivotal point is that punishment is not challenging for
offenders
Use synonyms
 and they
not
Change the verb form
do not
did not
show examples
fell
Correct your spelling
feel
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 paranoid. they know
laws
Correct article usage
the laws
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 in
adequate
Change the article
an adequate
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way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
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 and they feel know fearless. Moving
further
Linking Words
, it is pertinent to mention that countless facilities for, instance education, electricity, and, food bestow
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
free and easily.
Similarly
Linking Words
, few leaders are provided safety and protection for personal reasons
such
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 as
murder
Add an article
the murder
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 of opposition
politican
Correct your spelling
politicians
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, they want to become famous in the nation because
media
Correct article usage
the media
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 and
newspaper
Fix the agreement mistake
newspapers
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 are published these kinds
ofr
Correct your spelling
of
 news
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
front
Correct article usage
the front
show examples
 page . There are some techniques and strategies
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 find a decent solution
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 argument and which can certainly overwhelm the potential influence of
this
Linking Words
 concept.
Although
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, the most alarming one is that the government make
stricts
Correct your spelling
strict
 rules against
offenders
Use synonyms
.
Besides
Linking Words
, open new phycology
centre
Fix the agreement mistake
centres
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to
Change preposition
for
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 medical therapy for criminals.
Moreover
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, drugs and alcohol is the main reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 crime, might be in the future, should be banned these kinds of products.
Additionally
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, one sure example is that namely
urab
Correct your spelling
arab
 countries have zero crime rates in the region owing to they have mighty rules and regulations
in other words
Linking Words
 life hanging sentence, or, shoot and side order. To sum up, according to the argument aforementioned above, one can reach the conclusion that the given solution can tackle
this
Linking Words
 problem of committing crime rates in unique ways.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • rehabilitation
  • reintegration
  • recidivism
  • underlying issues
  • support systems
  • criminal networks
  • peer pressure
  • barriers
  • psychological assessment
  • addiction treatment
  • economic factors
  • sentencing
  • data analysis
  • community-based programs
  • restorative justice
  • vocational training
  • social inequalities
  • preventive measures
  • post-release
  • crime cycle
What to do next:
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