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Writing Samples
Band 6

To improve the job prospects, some people want the secondery schools to spend more time teaching communication and business skills and spend less time teaching history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#job #prospects #people #secondery #schools #time #communication #business #skills #history
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The phenomenon of
people
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 hoping schools can replace
history
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 classes with other subjects in order to increase the employment rate of first-graduated
people
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 has aroused wide concern among various circles. Divergent as
people
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's views on
this
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 issue in question may be, I totally agree that the
time
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 used on
history
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 lessons should be replaced by improving students' communication and
business
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skills
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. Of all the reasons why schools should spend more
time
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 on increasing pupils' social and
business
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skills
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, probably the most significant one is that those
skills
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 can be used in myriad fields of jobs than the knowledge from the past.
For instance
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, the experience of characters from historical books cannot help us to solve modern problems
such
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 as computer problems that when you use to finish your job.
Therefore
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,
business
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skills
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 are more valuable than
history
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 for most jobs. Another reason that should not be overlooked is that communication
skills
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 are essential to
people
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 whether able to get a job. To illustrate, an interview is a process that candidates prove they are useful and suitable for the company. Logically and clearly speaking can allow the interviewees to transfer their information to the interviewer.
As a result
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,
people
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 who are good at communicating with others have a higher chance of finding new jobs. Under
this
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 line of thinking, spending more
time
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 promoting communication and
business
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skills
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 is more effective than teaching
history
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 for students to find a job after school. So, I completely agree with
this
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 idea that the
time
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 used on historical subjects should be replaced by training the
skills
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 that help pupils find a career.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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