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Writing Samples
Band 6

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and insterets whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#employers #people #jobs #information #hobbies #insterets
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In the present day, with the advancement in society and the flat structure of companies, many employers sometimes request personal data from job applicants. These requests are mostly about their leisure time activities, likes and dislikes, marital status etc.
However
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, many or more people consider
this
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 info useful
while
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 others disagree.
Firstly
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, the community who agree with sharing personal information, are mostly open-minded. They pay more attention to blending with the new work environment, and colleagues. In order to do so, sharing personal data to some extent takes an important fact. In a way, it helps to get closer to others.
For instance
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, imagine you are a travel addict. There could be many folks in your office environment who like to travel. You can get to know them by sharing your travelling experience. The next time, you could be the person to organize the annual trip of the company.
Secondly
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, those who disagree with telling about their personal interest are introverts. They sometimes fear about giving personal info to someone else could harm their lifestyle. None of us can blame them as it could be because of their bad life experiences.
However
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, being a closed person takes a long time to blend with the community and it leads to some drawbacks
such
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 as getting neglected, being unable to recognize talents, having slow paths to promotions etc. My opinion is that
,
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 sharing your personal information should be done to a certain extent. For sure you do not need to share your sensitive knowledge with someone else, as privacy could
also
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 be used against us.
According to
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 my perspective, as a new joiner, sharing your hobbies, interests, and marital status won't harm you, and it will be a benefit for you to blend with the others in your working environment.
To conclude
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, gathering personal perspectives on
a
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an
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 interview is a common practice by many organizations around the world. Some of the applicants willingly share
this
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 with the employer,
while
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other
Correct pronoun usage
others
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 hesitate to do
such
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.
This
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 essay discussed both aspects with examples.
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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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