Some people think only students who achieve the best results should be rewarded, while others think it is more important to reward students who get huge improvement. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

As far as
i
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I
show examples
can see, the
people
who achieve the best
redults
Correct your spelling
results
and the
people
who get the huge
improvement
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
both
need
Change to a plural noun
needs
show examples
to be rewarded. There are both very important. Some
people
think that no matter what the process
like
Add a missing verb
is like
show examples
, the main aim is to have a good result, so the results are the most important. Only the
students
who achieve the best results need to be rewarded. On the other side,
reward
Wrong verb form
rewarding
show examples
the top
students
also
can encourage other
student
Change the wording
students
show examples
work
Fix the infinitive
to work
show examples
hard. Because the other student will know that if they want to get rewards,they need
be
Fix the infinitive
to be
show examples
the top
students
and they will keep working hard. The whole level of
class
Correct article usage
the class
show examples
will be improved in
this
way.
While
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
think the process is
also
very important. Because
people
can’t achieve
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
big success in a short time, they need to improve themselves gradually, so the
students
who improve a lot
also
need to be rewarded.
For example
,if one student can’t pass the exam before,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
he
get
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gets
show examples
70 scores
this
time. He
also
should be rewarded
although
70 is only a middle score
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because he works hard and
get
Change the verb form
gets
show examples
a huge
improvement
. In my opinion, the
students
who did best should be rewarded. But
study
Add an article
the study
show examples
is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work that
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
to
accumlate
Correct your spelling
accumulate
every day, so
encouage
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encourage
the
students
who get huge
improvement
is
also
very important. In
sammary
Correct your spelling
summary
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
agree with the second opinion. When teachers reward the top
students
, don’t forget to reward the
students
who get a huge
improvement
.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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