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Band 3.5

Some people believe that children should not be given homework every day, while others believe that they must get homework every day in order to be successful at school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #homework #school
Part of society thinks that
children
 do not need to do
homework
 after every
school
day
, and another part thinks that
children
 should do
homework
 every
day
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
this
 is not very necessary for
children
 every
day
. because they already spend more of their
time
 at
school
, more than half of their
time
. Of
course
Add a comma
course,
show examples
homework
 is needed, but not every
day
.
Children
 need to spend a lot of
time
 with their
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
, when
children
 come home after
school
 they will be tired and need rest and
children
also
 need more
time
 for physical activity.
And if
Correct word choice
If
show examples
 at
school
 they were given
homework
, they simply
won’t
Correct your spelling
wouldn’t
 have
time
 for games and rest, and they
can
Wrong verb form
could
show examples
 forget about spending
time
 with their parents.
For example
, I myself
also
 went through
this
. After
school
Add a comma
school,
show examples
 I went to sports and additional courses, but there was almost no
time
 left for games and rest, and it was very difficult for me to cope with
such
 a schedule . and that’s why I simply didn’t do my
homework
 and got a lot of bad grades at
school
 Personally, I don’t agree with
this
 opinion, and I think that
homework
 is an extra burden for the child. it can affect the child's development and character badly
Submitted by ina1_95 on

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task achievement
Introduce the essay with a brief explanation of the conflicting views on homework for children to provide a clear foundation for your discussion.
task achievement
Clearly state your thesis statement or main argument in the introduction to guide the reader through your essay.
task achievement
Develop separate paragraphs for discussing the views you do not agree with, providing counterarguments or reasons for your disagreement.
coherence and cohesion
Enhance the logical structure by organizing the essay into clear paragraphs: an introduction, body paragraphs for each view, and a conclusion summarizing your main points and stating your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words and phrases ('However,' 'Furthermore,' 'In contrast') to better connect ideas and paragraphs, improving the flow of the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Conclude your essay with a brief summary of the discussed viewpoints and your personal stance, reinforcing your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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