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Band 3

Education should be compulsory discuss both views or give your opinon]

#education #opinon]
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The youngest children start their
education
Use synonyms
 in a crèche, where they mostly play but
also
Linking Words
 do some early learning activities. I personally believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 nowadays children early learning worldly activities.
Furthermore
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,the famous UK public
schools
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 are in fact private fee-paying
schools
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.Between the ages of 11 and 18 young
people
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 take
wide
Add an article
a wide
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 range of subjects in arts, sciences and technical areas. In the UK,pupils can leave school at the age of 16,
although
Linking Words
 many young
people
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 choose to remain in full-time
education
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 until the age of 18. From my point of view,
education
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 is developed in Great Britain,
Linking Words
also
Correct word choice
but also
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of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 foreign countries too. In England
Add a comma
,
show examples
it is compulsory for young
people
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 to continue with some form of
education
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 or training until they are 18 even if they
also
Linking Words
 have a job. From 16 to 18 young
people
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 may study at secondary school or at a
sixth -form
Correct your spelling
sixth-form
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 college, after which they may go on to higher
education
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.
On the other hand
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, the quality of
education
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 is not satisfactory in Uzbekistan.
Moreover
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, is not enough experienced teacher and poor quality of
education
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 in
schools
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.
Also
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, is not enough condition in
schools
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 for students
study
Fix the infinitive
to study
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.Personally in my school is not enough experienced teachers. All in all, it is alleged that
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 educational system better in
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
 than Uzbekistan
this
Linking Words
 is in my view.
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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