In some countries, more and more adults choose to continue to live with their parents after they graduate and have found jobs. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh its disadvantages?

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Nowadays, the number of individuals who have decided to live with their
parents
Use synonyms
even after graduating is increasing. I suppose that
this
Linking Words
decision has more negative effects, in which individuals cannot become independent persons than these
of
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apply
show examples
positive, in which
people
Use synonyms
do not
be worry
Change the verb form
worry
show examples
about their living costs. On the one hand, it is
obligation
Add an article
an obligation
the obligation
show examples
for adults to live independently, and
to become
Change the verb form
becoming
show examples
independence
Replace the word
independent
show examples
is the key to adapt
this
Linking Words
society faster.
However
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
select to live with their
parents
Use synonyms
after graduating, they tend to rely on
parents
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, who serve not only
housings
Fix the agreement mistake
housing
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
Linking Words
from
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apply
show examples
daily meals to
cleaning
Wrong verb form
clean
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the rooms.
As a result
Linking Words
, these
people
Use synonyms
would be
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
parson
Correct your spelling
person
show examples
who cannot survive without their
parents
Use synonyms
. In my country,
for instance
Linking Words
, there are many adults who live with their
parents
Use synonyms
, and some of them depend on their
Use synonyms
parents’
Correct your spelling
parent’s
show examples
income.
Additionally
Linking Words
, those
people
Use synonyms
become not being able to communicate with other coworkers because they do not need to make
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
relationships with others unless they are in their homes. These persons are called “NEAT”, and
this
Linking Words
phenomenon is one of the social problems.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
to share
Change the verb form
sharing
show examples
a home leads to
serve
Change the verb form
serving
show examples
citizens’
money
Use synonyms
.
To live
Fix the infinitive
Live
show examples
alone, there is
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
financial difficulty, especially
housing
Change preposition
in housing
show examples
cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
show examples
. To illustrate, lending
house
Correct article usage
a house
show examples
costs around 100
thousands
Correct your spelling
thousand
show examples
yen per month, which accounts for
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
half of individuals’ monthly
wage
Fix the agreement mistake
wages
show examples
in Japan. The timing at which young
people
Use synonyms
start their jobs, it is inevitable to ask their
parents
Use synonyms
to support their
money
Use synonyms
.
As a consequence
Linking Words
, living with their
parents
Use synonyms
is one of the
solution
Change to a plural noun
solutions
show examples
for
money
Use synonyms
issues.
However
Linking Words
,
these person
Change the determiner
this person
these people
show examples
, who live with their
parents
Use synonyms
, have the possibility
not
Change preposition
of not
show examples
to make
Change the verb form
making
show examples
a living by
myself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
permanently. On balance, the drawbacks of living with
parents
Use synonyms
, which affect
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
’s
independency
Correct your spelling
independence
show examples
outweighs the benefit, which
solve
Change the verb form
solves
show examples
money
Use synonyms
concerns.
Submitted by t.watpot216 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • intergenerational
  • economic stability
  • cohabitation
  • living arrangements
  • financial autonomy
  • student loans
  • emotional stability
  • transitional phase
  • career development
  • self-reliance
  • independence
  • tension
  • values
  • lifestyles
  • personal space
  • autonomy
  • financial burden
What to do next:
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