Claiming the traditional schooling is out of date ,boring and stifles a child's natural talents,various professionals have pushed for an education revolution.Are there alternatives in the education system?Is traditional education doing more harm than good?give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people believe that conventional education does not boost children's talents which is

also

Linking Words

old and not useful. There are certain ways to redevelop the education system

along with

Linking Words

the recent technological advancements

otherwise

Linking Words

it is unlikely to raise

talentful

Correct your spelling

talented

generations.

To begin

Linking Words

with, since the world has been changing because of the latest innovation and globalisation, people should touch the 21st century with new educational methods rather than the traditional ones. The old system does not attract

students

Use synonyms

' attention because of the usage of materials.

In other words

Linking Words

face to face

Add a hyphen

face-to-face

show examples

lessons and following instructions of teachers are not helpful to raise creativity for

students

Use synonyms

. By

constrast

Correct your spelling

contrast

, if

students

Use synonyms

interact with the

last

Linking Words

technology by learning some computer programs, they can land

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a good job in the future and compete in the labour market.

Furthermore

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

today's teaching methods are not successful in the long term and

also

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make

students

Use synonyms

less active. To make it clear, many schools even today give heavy

school

Use synonyms

tasks which

increases

Change the verb form

increase

show examples

demotivations

Correct your spelling

demotivation

demotivating

For example

Linking Words

, I used to refuse to go to

school

Use synonyms

because of unattractive and heavy

school

Use synonyms

tasks elated to

rote-learning

Correct your spelling

rote learning

show examples

This

Linking Words

is why

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

even today I still do not like some subjects

such

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as maths and

physcis

Correct your spelling

physics

However

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, if

school

Use synonyms

subjects become interesting using

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

technological devices

such

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telescope

Fix the agreement mistake

telescopes

show examples

microscope

Fix the agreement mistake

microscopes

show examples

in science, it is likely to draw student attention.

To conclude

Linking Words

, the traditional education system related to rote learning does not have advantages for

students

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

problem can tackle by using the latest technology and making lessons more attractive.

ediz07

Feb 2, 2023

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

261 words

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