In recent years, there has been growing interest in the relationship between equality and personal achievement. Some people believe that individuals can achieve more in egalitarian societies. Others believe that high levels of personal achievement are possible only if individuals are free to succeed or fail according to their individual merits. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

In contemporary times, there has been a
raising
Correct your spelling
rising
show examples
fascination towards the connection between individual accomplishments and equality.
While
few
people
reckon that an individual can attain better in an equalitarian society, others are of the opinion that
this
can only be possible if opportunities are provided to
people
as per their abilities. In my opinion, there have to be equal chances only in some aspects
such
as the development of skills,
education
, medicine etc., and not in the matter of securing a job or a seat in educational institutions. On the one hand, each person should be
provisioned
Replace the word
provided
show examples
access to free health and
education
by the concerned authorities in every nation globally as
this
could keep everyone safe from medical risks and identify the right talent for appropriate jobs which in turn boosts its own economy.
For instance
, the Canadian government offers free health and
education
to every citizen, worker and permanent resident and ensures everybody is treated fairly
similarly
by imposing slab taxation on income earners.
Consequently
, everyone not only gets equal exposure and a chance to prove themselves but
also
obtain scholarships later based on their merits.
As a result
, capable persons could get into some good organizations or begin their own startups after their
education
.
On the other hand
, egalitarianism necessarily means it has to be in all sorts of categories like social,
economical
Correct word choice
economic
show examples
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
financial etc., irrespective of skill and potential everybody would be treated as identical. To explain it clearly, the reservation system in India is a prime example which helps
people
from downward sections of society to study and secure a seat in top institutions even without appropriate knowledge owing to the fact that all sects don't follow the same level of performance indicators.
Although
this
is considered equality by considering other factors by some, it does injustice to the right talent.
To conclude
, an equalitarian society is definitely needed just to ensure all are treated fairly and equally in accessing the resources needed for enhancement of the skills
instead
of treating skill levels for different
people
based on other factors.
Submitted by prudhvi.pinninti18 on

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Language
Use more formal language and avoid contractions (e.g., can't, doesn't).
Structuring
Ensure that the introduction and conclusion clearly introduce and summarize the main points of the essay. Also, provide a clear opinion in the introduction and restate it in the conclusion.
Content
Provide more specific examples and elaborate on them to support your ideas.

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