IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some of the methods used in advertising are unethical and unacceptable in today’s society. To what extent do you agree with this view?

#methods #today’s #society
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Nowadays in worldwide nations, every moment, we
are displayed
Change the verb form
have displayed
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 advertisements on TV shows,
magazines
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in magazines
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 or
huge
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on huge
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 LED boards situated
on
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at
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 intersections. In what methods they are produced or how much
producers
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do producers
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 care about
ethical
Add an article
the ethical
an ethical
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trend
Fix the agreement mistake
trends
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to
Change preposition
in
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 making them? I believe they
intent
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intend
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 to have more
watcher
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watchers
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 to earn more money regardless
to
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of
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 its consequences.
In
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From
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first
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the first
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 point of view, some families my does not need something
that is
displaying
Wrong verb form
displayed
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 on tv, but as home
wife
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wives
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 see the
advertisement
 will feel
that is
 a good idea to have it and decide to buy it immediately. In another case, there
is
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are
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 families who have young offspring who mentally
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 not wise enough to perceive everything in
family
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a family
the family
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 situation.
Therefore
, they will have high demand
while
 they are watching a new toy
advertisement
. Begging his parent to purchase it and crying all time.
As a
result
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,result
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 his poor father will be
finally
 obliged to buy the toy. In
second
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the second
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 point, they may use psychological weaknesses;
for example
, by displaying a young lady with
fitness
Correct article usage
a fitness
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 body who is using some stuff on
Add an article
the show
a show
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show
Correct your spelling
how
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 to attract people for the good. It may
apparently
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appear
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 not
so
Add a missing verb
be so
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 bad, but if we go deep
in
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apply
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down will understand
that
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apply
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how it may have an effect
of
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on
show examples
Correct article usage
the youth
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youth
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youth's
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 brain and corrupt it. Or by using
a charming sentences
Correct the article-noun agreement
charming sentences
a charming sentence
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 on
cigarette
Correct article usage
the cigarette
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 box "the ideal of a manhood" as a person
see
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sees
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this
advertisement
 on the box, will feel
himself
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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on
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apply
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his dreams and will buy it. In conclusion, the
advertisement
 makers, regardless
to
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of
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 the bad effects the
advertise
Replace the word
advertisement
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 may cause on people, will
made
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make
be made
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 them
due to
make
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making
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 their customers satisfying. But it may have bad consequences on society which
due to
 avoiding
this
 trend
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 suggest authorities make some plans for the circumstance to check and control advertisements before showing up.
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Unethical
  • Unacceptable
  • Deceptive
  • Exaggerated
  • Misleading
  • Manipulation
  • Vulnerable
  • Targeted advertising
  • Perpetuation
  • Societal norms
  • Stereotypes
  • Negative body image
  • Intrusion of privacy
  • Data-driven
  • Over-saturation
  • Desensitization
  • Annoyance
  • Greenwashing
  • Eco-conscious
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