Some people think that parents have a great influence on their children. Others believe that the media is a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

It is often argued that
parents
influence the behaviour of their
children
,
while
others suggest that media have a big impact on their development characters. In my opinion, I partially agree with both points of view because each factor participates in developing the personality of
children
.
To begin
with,
children
are greatly influenced by their relatives because they represent the first teacher in their life.
Moreover
, by observing his genitors, a
child
is able not only to learn values and morals but
also
to improve his social skills and emotional intelligence.
For example
, in most kindergartens, each
child
has his own personality that differs
according to
his relatives.
Furthermore
,
it is clear that
the atmosphere
presents
Replace the word
present
show examples
at home has a great impact on shaping the personality of the
child
because it affects tremendously his behaviour.
On the other hand
, the media has
also
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
part of
Add an article
the
show examples
responsibility to build the character of the youngster for many reasons.
Firstly
, these days,
parents
have a hectic work schedule and less time which
deprive
Correct subject-verb agreement
deprives
show examples
them of being close to their
children
.
Secondly
, it is well-known that the brain of a
child
is able to assimilate any information and
could not
Wrong verb form
cannot
show examples
differentiate between bad and good ones because it is not completely developed.
As a result
, he finds himself all day in front of a Television watching program directed to an adult audience which could affect his development negatively.
For instance
, it is reported that many
children
behave badly at school because they get used to watching violent shows on TV without the knowledge of their
parents
. In conclusion,
parents
have a great influence
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
children
Change noun form
children's
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life.
However
, media are
also
another factor to consider that contributes to building
child's
Correct article usage
a child's
show examples
character.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Work on improving the structure of your essay by ensuring a clear introduction, body paragraphs with supporting points, and a strong conclusion.
Task Response
Make sure to address all aspects of the task prompt thoroughly. Present a balanced argument discussing both views and then clearly state your own opinion. Include specific examples to support your points.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • role models
  • mimic behavior
  • worldviews
  • moral frameworks
  • exposure
  • social interactions
  • educational pursuits
  • social skills
  • emotional intelligence
  • pervasive influence
  • digital technology
  • perceptions
  • attitudes
  • behaviors
  • information dissemination
  • diverse perspectives
  • cultures
  • broader understanding
  • peer influence
  • trends
  • social media platforms
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