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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that educational success depends on good teachers, while others believe that students attitude is important. Discuss both views and give you’re opinion.

#people #success #teachers #students #attitude #you’re
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These days,
people
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 are concentrating more on studies to lead a better future. Few
people
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 think that their
education
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 qualities
depends
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depend
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 on the professors.
On the other hand
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, they believe that the behaviour of the
student
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in
Correct your spelling
is
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 more
concern
Replace the word
concerning
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 than the other.
This
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 essay will discuss both   views and my opinion in the upcoming paragraph. There are several reasons that
success
Correct article usage
the success
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 of
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student
Add an article
the student
a student
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is depends
Change the verb form
depends
show examples
 on good lecturers.
To begin
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 with, guidance from
the
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apply
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experienced professors
help
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helps
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 us to lead a successful
life
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. As we are in
adult
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the adult
show examples
 stage we have a lot of
things
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 going on in our
mind
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minds
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 which leads to
distract
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distracting
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from
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us from
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 the path to
acheive
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achieve
 success. In order to avoid that, we need to take
a
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the
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 right decision before we
pursue
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itpursue
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. For that, we need
a
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apply
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guidance from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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educated senior
people
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.
Furthurmore
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Furthermore
, friendly conversation among the students
help
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helps
show examples
 to get out of their boundaries. So that, teachers can help to improve
student
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weakness
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weaknesses
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 and
strength
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strengths
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,
Meanwhile
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,Meanwhile
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 they can learn a lot of
things
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 other than studies. These factors help the
student
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 to improve
on
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apply
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himself
as well as
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 in
education
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.
However
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, few
people
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thing
Correct your spelling
think
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 that behaviour is more important than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
education
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.
Firstly
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, the right
attitude
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 of the students helps
to
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them to
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 lead a successful
life
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.
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Fix the agreement mistake
Students
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Student
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The student
A student
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 should be obedient and
discipline
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disciplined
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,
behave
Correct word choice
and behave
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 like a man not like a child
,
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apply
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 because our
attitude
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 defines
ourselves
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us
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 who we are whether we are
good
Add an article
a good
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 or bad
person
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people
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.
Secondly
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, we should behave in
a
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apply
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such
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 a manner that everyone should be
suprised
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surprised
. Our mannerism speaks a lot
than
Correct quantifier usage
more than
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the
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apply
show examples
other
things
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. These are the reasons some
people
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 say
attitude
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 is important. In my opinion, both
the
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apply
show examples
things
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 are important if you want to lead a successful career. Our
attitude
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 and
education
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plays
Change the verb form
play
show examples
 a significant role in our
life
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.
To conclude
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,
that
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apply
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this
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 essay has discussed
about
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apply
show examples
how good lecturers
plays
Change the verb form
play
show examples
 a crucial role in
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
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life
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 and discipline of the
student
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 which
exhibit
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exhibits
show examples
mannersim
Correct your spelling
mannerism
mannerisms
, we can lead a wonderful career if we have
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
 personalities
Submitted by santosh2001kk on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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