IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think it is important for children to go to school. Discuss both the advantages of each method and give your own opinion

#people #children #home #child’s #development #school #method
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In the modern era, teaching at
home
Use synonyms
 became popular. Some people believe that teaching at
home
Use synonyms
 cannot substitute
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
education in
school
Use synonyms
whereas
Linking Words
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
other
Change the wording
another
show examples
 side with
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
 teaching at
home
Use synonyms
much
Add a missing verb
is much
show examples
effective
Correct quantifier usage
more effective
show examples
 rather than in education organizations. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I will discuss both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
views and draw my own opinion.
To begin
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 with,
effectiveness
Add an article
the effectiveness
show examples
 of teaching at
home
Use synonyms
considered
Add a missing verb
is considered
show examples
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the best way to learn subjects. Children at
school
Use synonyms
 have a plethora of distractions to be well-educated. Take Kazakh pupils as an example, the majority of them study in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school
Use synonyms
 using their phones, gadgets and headphones
while
Linking Words
teacher
Correct article usage
the teacher
show examples
conduct
Correct subject-verb agreement
conducts
show examples
 the process of studying and
this
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 fact doesn’t care him or her.
Secondly
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, students lose their main purposes of study. What I mean by saying
this
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 is that children at
school
Use synonyms
studying
Wrong verb form
study
show examples
 how to be good-rated rather than how to perceive useful knowledge.
As a result
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, society obtains just an
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
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 with good grades at
school
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instead
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 of
high-qualified
Add an article
a high-qualified
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worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
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. Turning to the other side of
this
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 is that children studying at
school
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 with other pupils like him or
her
Change the pronoun
she
show examples
 can learn not only knowledge which gives education system but
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
 personal and social skills
such
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 as communicativeness and verbal skills which
really
Add a missing verb
are really
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 important in growing with the world of communication.
To sum up
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, being high-qualified and
awareness
Replace the word
aware
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 of what you learn and
knowing
Change the form of the verb
know
show examples
 what you want in the future overweight any
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
personal skills. I strongly support
home
Use synonyms
-teaching
more
Add a missing verb
being more
show examples
 beneficial still than
take
Wrong verb form
taking
show examples
 knowledge at
school
Use synonyms
. Invest money and time
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
productiveness
Replace the word
productivity
show examples
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
wisely.
Submitted by saparzhaksylyk0101 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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