IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that government should invest more money in teaching science than other subjects in order for a country to develop and progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #government #money #science #subjects #country #progress
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Many people argue that government should invest more money in teaching
science
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 than other subjects to help a
country
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 develop and progress. In my opinion, the government should put
science
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 on top of all subjects,
while
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 other disciplines may not less important and need to be considered as a second priority based on the needs. Plenty of research and practices say that
science
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 plays a significant role in advancing some leading
countries
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 worldwide. Manufacture Engineering was an example of applied
science
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 that could help some
countries
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 develop.
For instance
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, Japan is currently leading in that subject as an advanced
country
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. Global brands and profound manufacturers
such
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 as Honda, Toyota, Suzuki and Mitsubishi were founded in Japan. No wonder the manufacturing industry is the backbone of
this
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country
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's economy. Without a doubt,
science
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 may be critical for some
countries
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 to gain much income, but others may
also
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 help in different fields. Communication was one topic outside the
science
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 subject that could contribute to the
countries
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 liaising with other counterparts outside the nation. I firmly believe having some best communication experts can increase the possibility for the
country
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 to achieve some bilateral agreements and business that benefits them. Indonesia is one
country
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 which has top-notch negotiating skills. One of the deals they conducted
finally
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 landed them into a promising agreement to help its Capital City extend its rapid mass transportation projects. In conclusion, in developing
countries
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, we should not only rely on
science
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 subjects but
also
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 consider another discipline so that both of them would complete each other and
finally
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, create an impact.
Submitted by raymondgandi on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • innovation
  • economic growth
  • holistic development
  • technological advancements
  • critical thinking
  • cultural awareness
  • sustainable development
  • return on investment (ROI)
  • global competitiveness
  • job market
  • equitable education
  • funding allocation
  • curriculum balance
  • civic responsibilities
  • interdisciplinary approach
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