IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

People today increasingly use credit cards to make monthly purchases. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #credit #cards #purchases #outweigh
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Since the technologies made a step beyond our imagination of the world, people have started to make a purchase, frequently using
credit
Use synonyms
 cards. Even though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
credit
Use synonyms
 cards have certain drawbacks, I strongly believe that
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
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 overweigh
disadvantages
Correct article usage
the disadvantages
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 of utilizing
this
Linking Words
 kind of payment method. First of all, the most substantial privilege of
Use synonyms
credit
Correct article usage
a credit
show examples
card
Use synonyms
 is that a person is no longer required to carry an excessive amount of cash when buying anything.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, it is quite convenient and safe to put a
card
Use synonyms
 into
wallet
Correct article usage
a wallet
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 and carry
on
Correct pronoun usage
it on
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 during shopping time. In the meantime, it allows people to keep track of expenses through
mobile
Add an article
a mobile
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phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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 or smart
watch
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watches
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.
For instance
Linking Words
, when a customer makes a purchase of
book
Add an article
the book
a book
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, paying by
credit
Use synonyms
card
Use synonyms
, just after a few seconds he will get a message from
bank
Add an article
the bank
a bank
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 about the amount spent.
Secondly
Linking Words
, it is beneficial
using
Change the verb form
to use
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 only
credit
Use synonyms
 cards for
country’s
Correct article usage
the country’s
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 economy, because thanks to
this
Linking Words
 type of payment method the authority can manage all financial incomes and expenditures of residents.
Hence
Linking Words
, it gives a great opportunity to rightly allocate a budget and solve social issues. To illustrate, a year ago the government of Kazakhstan awarded a grant
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 young entrepreneurs because of
to
Change preposition
apply
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the returned money of corrupt officials.
To sum up
Linking Words
, it is undeniable that using
plastic
Add an article
the plastic
show examples
Use synonyms
card
Fix the agreement mistake
cards
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 can be one of the main reasons for the occurrence of a cyber attack.
However
Linking Words
, if to utilize cashless payment properly and strengthen
a
Correct article usage
the
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 security service of
bank
Correct article usage
the bank
show examples
app
Fix the agreement mistake
apps
show examples
 people may avoid unpleasant situations.
Submitted by Allazhar on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cashless transactions
  • Financial footprint
  • Interest rates
  • Credit score
  • Consumerism
  • Debt accumulation
  • Expenditure tracking
  • Fraudulent activities
  • Overspending
  • Purchase protection
  • Revolving credit
  • Creditworthiness
  • Impulse buying
  • Secured credit card
  • Unsecured credit card
  • Spending limit
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