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Writing Samples
Band 5

The table below shows information about age, average income per person and population below poverty line in three states in the USA. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below shows information about age, average income per person and population below poverty line in three states in the USA. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The provided figure shows data about age, average income per person and population below
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poverty
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the poverty
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line
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 in 3 states:
California
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,
Utah
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 and
Florida
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 It can be concluded from the table that
while
Linking Words
Florida
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 has the highest
percentage
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 of the elder age group,
Utah
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 has the highest
percentage
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 of
people
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 under 18 and
this
Linking Words
 state
also
Linking Words
 has the least proportion of
population
Correct article usage
the population
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 below
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poverty
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the poverty
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line
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.
California
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 has the greatest
percentage
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 of average income per person and population below
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poverty
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the poverty
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line
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. Out of the 3 states, the proportion of
people
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 aged 18 or under is
the
Correct article usage
apply
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noticeably higher in
Utah
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, at 28%, the second place is
California
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 with 17% and 16% in
Florida
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.
On the contrary
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, 23% of elderly
people
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 aged 60 and more in
Florida
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 compared to 13% in
California
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 and only 8% in
Utah
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 It can be seen that the proportion of average income per person in
California
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 is higher than the other states, at 23,000$, followed up by
Florida
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 with 22,000$ and 17,000$ in
Utah
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. Compared to
Utah
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 with only 9% and 12% in
Florida
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, the
percentage
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 of
people
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 below
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poverty
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the poverty
show examples
line
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 in
California
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 is gradually high, at 16%.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 77%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words poverty, line, california, utah, florida, percentage, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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