Young people are now spending more and more time and money following fashion trends. What is your opinion? Is this a positive and negative development

There is a controversial perspective heating up a debate over whether adolescents currently have a tendency to consume an amount of
time
and finance following
fashion
Correct article usage
the fashion
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movement.
This
phenomenon has both pros and cons,
however
, its disadvantages may outweigh its counterpart.
Firstly
, without a shadow of a doubt, spending hours and bills for pursuing a
fashion
shift plays a paramount significant role for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
youngsters for the
time
being. To be specific, the young are prone to take up a
fashion
lifestyle with a view to finding out
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
suitability of
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
group.
For example
, The Crazy Shoes is one of
enormous
Add an article
the enormous
show examples
footwear networks
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
youngsters have a common interest in following up-to-the-minute shoe
fashion
.
Therefore
,
time
and bills come in handy to catch up with the
fashion
trend of the young does wonders for connecting circle friends.
Secondly
,
while
the merits of the
fashion
trend to be followed by
time
and money of juveniles are widely acknowledged, it is unfair if the drawbacks of
this
pursuit are ignored.
In particular
, utilizing too much
time
and money
for
Change preposition
on
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top-notch
fashion
acts as a disturbance
for
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to
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other helpful hobbies which can enhance themselves.
Traveling
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Travelling
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to new lands
such
as Germany, Italy,
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
and to name a
few
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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can be cited as an instance of good
hobbies
Fix the agreement mistake
hobby
show examples
to revamp language and cultural knowledge rather than
fashion
.
Hence
, taking advantage of money and
time
on
fashion
trends can put
strain
Add an article
a strain
show examples
on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adolescents.
To sum up
,
while
fashion
trends can do wonders for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
youngsters by boosting their confidence in socializing, it
also
brings a negative impact on improving themselves by ignoring other helpful hobbies.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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